Macabre
by SilverHawk92
Summary: A suspenseful combination of Shrek, Ice Age, Finding Nemo and Toy Story.
1. Chapter 1

_**These books combine the following movies: Finding Nemo, Ice Age, Shrek, and Toy Story. These books are not yet rated by the following companies: 20th Century Fox, Blue Sky Studios, Dreamworks, Pixar, Walt Disney Pictures. Enjoy reading! -SilverHawk92 (08.16.12 at 2:45 PM)**_

**MACABRE  
Part 1**

**01.12.12 - 2.26.12**

Ellie (looking around): Is it just me, or is it warmer?

Manny (approaching): You've gone off the deep end. It's just as cold as it's always been.

Ellie: No, I'm sure of it.

Sid: You don't think it's possible you're just worried about your...pardon the joke...brothers?

Ellie: No, I'm sure.

Sid: Well, fine then. If we suddenly see a volcano, or...the sun...we'll let you know you were right all this time.

(Diego sits in his place as as Manny wraps his trunk around Sid and tosses him out into the snow.)

Manny: Mind your manners.

Sid (as his hand pokes out from the snow): A trait you master in.

Manny: Ellie, get back inside. We don't want you freezing the both of you.

(Ellie walks back inside cave)

Sid (sitting up quickly enough to create a billowing of steam and explosion of powder snow): I bet it's hot flashes.

(Manny and Diego follow Ellie inside, with Sid scrambling to catch up)

Peaches: I don't want a sibling.

Diego: It's not exactly up for debate anymore.

(Manny laughs a bit)

Ellie: Sorry, sweetie, but your uncle Diego's right. This is gonna happen.

Sid: I, for one, think your attitude is a disgrace.

Manny: Sid, I'm warning you.

Sid: What?! Look, all I'm saying is, if the mini-mammoth Ellie's expecting can hear her from heaven, he would be sad to hear his own sister say that.

Peaches (to Ellie): What's heaven?

Ellie: It's where an almighty mammoth uses special powers to create other animals.

(Peaches is smiling)

Sid: It's also where good animals go when they die.

Peaches: Die?

Sid: Stop living. Forever.

(Peaches stops smiling)

Manny: Sid, I won't say it again.

Sid: Hey, I wasn't gonna say where the bad animals go.

Manny (standing): You should probably go now.

Sid: Huh. I wonder if that's why Santa has a naughty list. You think he's undercover?

(Peaches is on the verge of tears)

Diego: Sid, if you don't leave right now; YOU won't be up for debate.

Sid: Alright, I'm leaving. (heads into deeper part of cave)

(Diego looks to his right at Manny and, without looking away, sits down)

Ellie (to Peaches): Okay, time for bed. You have school tomorrow.

Peaches: Hey, Mom, what do you think humans think of us?

Ellie: Probably the same things we think of them.

Peaches: They're big and scary?

Diego: You just wait a while, kid. Pretty soon when you're as tall as your parents; they won't seem so bad.

Peaches: That'd be neat.

Manny: And you know what? Having a sibling won't seem so bad either. I mean, Sid's just being a goof 'cuz he knows how to. Very well. Your sibling could be a girl.

Peaches: So? She'd still be intruding.

Ellie: Not really. Guys just naturally seem instrusive; and until your sister arrives, we'll be outnumbered. But when she gets here, the score'll be even. And you'll get to teach her things a girl should know.

Peaches: Oh, that's why I'm going to school. So she doesn't have to. Will she be your favorite?

Manny: There'll be no favorites.

Ellie: We'll love you both the same.

Peaches: So...will your love for me go up or down?

Manny: What? No, neither.

(Peaches, Ellie and Diego all look at him)

Manny: Up. Definitely up.

Peaches: So there's room for improvement? What'm I doing wrong?

(Diego, Ellie and Manny exchange troubled glances as Peaches huffily heads for her favorite spot on the floor)

Ellie: I have a good name for this baby. Be it girl or boy.

Diego: Oh, that's great. A unisex name for an innocent baby. Nothing makes one feel more loved by its parents.

Ellie: Relax, would you? It isn't a bad name.

Manny: So let's hear it.

Ellie: Tyroko!

Manny: Hmm.

Ellie: What?

Manny (heading for bed): No, just...nothing, I like it. It's good. Very good. Cute.

(Ellie and Diego look at each other in wonderment before both look back at Manny)

THE NEXT DAY, ELLIE IS WALKING PEACHES TO SCHOOL...

Passerby Pachyrhinosaurus (to the Hoplitosaurus at his side): Anybody with half a brain knows the snow is melting.

(Ellie's eyes follow them as they pass; her steps faltering. Her trunk is entertwined with Peaches', so neither will lose the other)

Peaches (to Pachyrhinosaurus): My dad says it isn't.

(Pachyrhinosaurus and Hoplitosaurus turn)

Peaches: He says it's just as cold as ever.

Pachyrhinosaurus: Your dad ain't thinkin' straight.

Ellie: Hey, that's my man you're talking about!

Hoplitosaurus (to Ellie): Ease up, he's had a bad week.

Ellie: His attitude's probably what caused it.

(hesitation)

Hoplitosaurus (to Pachyrhinosaurus): Ease up, she has a kid.

Passerby Tyrannosaurus Rex: Keep the line moving, midgets.

Passerby Wuerhosaurus (to Tyrannosaurus Rex): Hey, if you were my size, you wouldn't be mouthin' off.

(ELLIE AND PEACHES TURN LEFT, DUCKING OUT OF LINE...)  
Ellie: Well, have a good day at school.

Peaches (walking toward group of animal/mammal students and some animal/mammal teachers): Oh, yeah. Sure. Why not just call me Charity and give me a tipping jar?

Pachyrhinosaurus: Hey, look at that! No more kid!

Ellie: Now don't you start. Can't you see I'm cold, wet, hungry and pregnant? Leave me alone.

Hoplitosaurus: Ease up, Monty. (leaves with Pachyrhinosaurus, moving forward)

Ellie (to self): Good. Finally. (leaves, heading in opposite direction; the way she came)

(MANNY IS IN THE CAVE WITH SID AND DIEGO. ELLIE HAS TAKEN PEACHES TO SCHOOL; CRASH AND EDDIE HAVE NOT YET RETURNED FROM THEIR TRIP. DIEGO APPROACHES MANNY...)

Manny: Ellie was right.

Diego: Just cluing in now, huh?

Manny: I thought the pregnancy was just getting to her. That or hunger.

Diego: Aside from thinking she was a possum for most of her life; you underestimate her.

Manny: Yeah. Gone are the days when I was a bachelor. No wife, no kid, no sidekicks. Just quiet.

Diego: I miss the quiet sometimes. But you are adding one more mammoth to the future. Who knows? She might end up making you a grandfather.

(hesitation)

Manny: Yep. Gone are the days.

(Ellie walks into cave; scene fades into a snowy endless white area; in which we can vaguely see Crash and Eddie walking...)

Eddie: I can't see a thing.

Crash: And I'm hungry. How much further?

Eddie: I just said I can't see! How am I supposed to know? I don't even know if we're going in the right direction anymore.

(hesitation)  
Eddie: Crash?

(hesitation)

Eddie: Crash, this isn't funny.

(hesitation)  
Eddie: Oh, frack.

(Scene fades to the cave)

Ellie (pacing): What's taking them so long? ...They should be back by now.

Manny (laying down): Stop worrying. If anything, they can take three more weeks, for all I care.

Ellie: Well, maybe you care more about you than me.

Sid: So much for not playing favorites.

Manny: That rule only applies to the children, Sid - (turns to Ellie) ...and no I don't. I simply mean - I have to take care _of _myself, but I care more _about you_.

Ellie: You're just sayin' that 'cuz I'm helping you 'save our species'.

Manny: Don't do that. (Ellie asks _What? _as Manny is still speaking) Don't drag up the past. I only said that because Sid said that. And I only said it because at the time, I thought we really were the last two mammoths! I mean - it's possible!

Sid: Might I just...?

Manny (interrupting): Do you remember when we saw all those mammoths? There were thirty-two of them. And do you know how many of them are left? Seven.

Diego: Whoa.

Sid: Amazing, you counted them all?

(In the background, Diego is seen hitting him in the back of the head)  
Manny: So forgive me if I'm a bit pessimistic.

Diego: Can I have an input?

Manny: That right there is an input, but go on.

Diego: Peaches doesn't seem too happy lately. And why's that? She's stuck in a cave with two arguing parents and Sid. Maybe she'll be happier if you find and stay with these remaining mammoths.

(hesitation)

Ellie: This cave is what keeps us safe and dry.

Diego (standing): Well, if you care more about the common cave than your kid...

Manny: Nothing means more than Peaches.

(Ellie clears throat)

Manny: And - of course - my wife and our expectant.

Ellie: Good. Thank you.

(hesitation)

Sid: So now what?

Manny: Now I'm going to pick up Peaches from school. Then we wait for Crash and Eddie. And then we go find these other mammoths. (looks at an approving Ellie)

Sid: What if Crash and Eddie never come back?

(Manny and Diego look at him in silent fury as a crying Ellie hurries to the deeper, darker part of the cave)  
Sid (looking after her; oblivious to Manny and Diego): Oops.

(Manny wraps his trunk around Sid's neck and lifts him up into the air. Diego watches without much reaction)

Manny: I'm torn between carrying you like this to Peaches' school and just tossing you around; or letting Diego do the honors for me.

Diego: Would be an honor.

Manny (letting Sid drop): I'm won. Besides, my kid shouldn't see that. Oh, and Diego, when you've finished him; maybe check on Ellie?

Diego: Got it.

(Manny leaves; Sid only then tries to sit up, but is refrained when Diego puts a paw on his neck; all claws extracted)

Diego: War dictates - the prey lies low.

Sid (thinking as fast as possible): I, uh, I haven't had a bath in weeks.

Diego (unscathed): Who says you'll stay in one piece?

(hesitation)  
Sid: You love Ellie, don't you!

Diego: I'm just doing my chore.

Sid: Right. It has nothing to do with your loving Manny's girl.

(hesitation)  
(Sid grabs Diego's paw. Diego puts his paw quickly on the ground, trapping Sid's hand underneath it)

Diego: Why do you bother?

Sid (struggling to free hand): Look, you can't - you can't always be the alpha dog.

Diego: Who's gonna replace me? You?

(hesitation)  
Sid: You're dealing with a force much stronger than yourself, buddy.

Diego: I doubt that.

(Ellie is seen running outside and disappearing within the foliage nearest to the cave)  
Sid: I think we should take our dilemma to her.

Diego: Now?

Sid: Sure! She's the stronger force. It's only logical.

Diego (beginning to smile): Okay. Sure. You lead.

Sid (freeing himself): Fine. (follows Ellie into bushes; Diego stays where he is)  
(hesitation)  
Ellie (from within foliage): Sid, what on earth! (continues speaking as Sid runs out toward Diego...) Diego, if you still intend on hurting him, you'd better do it fast!

(Sid looks up at Diego in shock; Diego growls at him with a mean expression on his face. Sid flees - Diego follows. He has Sid pinned to the ground, claws extracted right near his neck; when Lenny, Zeke, and Oscar - three sabers from Diego's past - pass by and stop to watch. However, seeing them, Diego releases Sid)  
Lenny: Still can't live up to your purpose, Diego? You must have the spine of a jellyfish.

Sid: At least he isn't the one who's only as intelligent as a bubble.

Oscar: Hey, look, guys. My supper's talkin' to me.

Sid (surrendering as the three tigers close in on him): Okay, okay, that was a bit uncalled for.

Diego: Yeah, you've always been one to man up.

Sid: Diego, I could really...I could really use your help here.

Diego: Okay, forget that... (To Lenny, Zeke and Oscar) You know, I'd be more interested in something actually important enough to be missed. Don't waste your time.

Lenny (turning to face him): Oh? Is that a volunteer I'm hearing?  
Diego: Gee, who's gonna win - the jellyfish or the bubble?

Zeke (surrendering): C'mon guys, I'm too hungry to do this right now.

Diego: That's because you aren't a good hunter. I'm surprised you haven't succombed to cannibalism.

(Lenny and Oscar leave hesitantly; led by the desperate and therefore more hasty Zeke)  
Sid: Whew. You did it again.

Diego (walking in the opposite direction): Yeah. Ain't I a peach.

LATER ON IN THEIR CAVE; AS DIEGO, SID AND ELLIE ARE JUST LYING AROUND; DIEGO NOTICES ELLIE DOES NOT SEEM LIKE HERSELF...  
Sid: Boy, all that snow is really somethin'.  
Ellie (in acknowledgement): Hmm.  
Sid: It's awful, it's amazing...  
Ellie (in boredom): Mm-hmm.  
Diego: It's like you, Sid; it swings both ways.  
Sid: Aw, thanks, buddy.  
Diego: I didn't mention 'amazing'.  
(Sid gets a look of concentration as Manny walks into the cave with Peaches)  
Manny: Diego, I told you to... (eyes flicker down to Peaches and then find Sid, becoming filled with hate) ...take out the trash.  
Diego: What can I say, there's no place suitable enough.  
Ellie: Manny, don't burden him with your chore. I asked you yesterday to throw that deceased rat out of this cave.  
Diego: He's been trying since he met Sid.  
Sid: Haha, very funny.  
Ellie: Diego, don't be a jack -  
Sid: Oh! Oh, I get it! You're sick, Diego. Very twisted.  
Ellie: Sid, don't be rude.  
(Pause)  
Diego: Ellie, you okay?  
Ellie: Don't condescend to me! (heads into the deeper part of the cave)  
(Stunned pause)  
Sid: Wow, she's touchy.  
Ellie (calling, voice echoes): I heard that! (barely audible mutters resonate through cave)  
Sid (turning to Diego): And I do not.  
Diego (ignoring Sid and speaking instead to Manny): Maybe you should go and see...  
Manny: I'm not going in there!  
Diego: I just think...  
Manny: Are you insane?

Ellie (crying): Are you...afraid of me...?

Manny (muttering): Thanks a lot. (heads into the deeper part of the cave; despite his gentler tone at next words, the sound once again resonates...) No, I'm not scared of you; not unless you want me to be, that's...  
(Diego loses interest and goes outside. Alone, he enjoys the silence - for a few seconds, at which point Sid follows him)  
Sid (making Diego twitch in sheer annoyance): Wow. You made him walk right into the fire. Must be your jealousy acting up. You want Ellie for yourself, but to get there, you have to wreck what they have.  
(Diego says nothing)  
Sid: And I have discovered you. You and your filthy demise.  
(Sid remains in view, expression unchanging even at Diego's snarl)  
Diego: If I'd considered your opinion valuable, I'd have asked you for it. Now get lost.  
(At next words, Diego is shown from the front side; eyes smoldering as Sid continues speaking...)  
Sid: Oh, buddy, you're getting much too old for this tough guy thing.  
Peaches (from behind Sid): Uncle Sid? ...I miss Crash and Eddie.  
Sid (to Diego): Now this, buddy, is the job for creatures like you. Watch and learn. (turns to Peaches) Oh, they'll be back before you know it. (turns back to Diego) See that? Just like that. (turns back to Peaches at her voice...)  
Peaches: You're just saying that to teach the teacher.  
Sid: No, no, they'll be back. I know it.  
Peaches: Do you have radar?

Sid: Well, no...  
Peaches: Do you hear them in your mind?

Sid: No, no I...  
Peaches: Then you can't know anything.  
Sid: I...I'm thinkin' they'll be back...  
Peaches: I see, and has your mind served you well before? (glaring, she turns and hurries inside)  
Sid: Just a kid! Just a kid and she - (turning to face Diego, he sees no sign of him anywhere) Diego?

Manny (from behind): Sid, stop talking to yourself and let's go. We have two possums to find, and a bunch of mammoths, too. Go get Diego and let's move.

Sid: I can't.

Manny: Okay, you stay behind. I don't got a problem with that.

Sid: No, Diego's gone.

Manny (looking up at sky): Always take the wrong one.  
Sid (also looking up): Who are you talking to?

Manny (turning back into cave, looking over shoulder): Let's just say it's up for debate.

(Sid looks shocked as he stares after him; scene fades into another, in which Diego is seen traipsing along a path in the forest; which is almost hidden by snow. More snow is falling heavily)  
Diego (to self): Too old? Too old - please. I'm a tiger, none too old. Tigers are mean, it's in their blood. And Peaches. Younger than him by almost a decade, I'm sure, and I can stand her. She sure ain't no Sid, I'll give her that. Man, I'd take him by his scrawny neck and use him like a napkin.

Accusing voice: Ow!

(Diego freezes and looks tentatively around)

Crash (emerging from treeline): What's eating you?

Diego: Nothing. Come up behind me like that again, there'll be somethin' eating you.

Crash: Whatever. Look, I can't find Eddie.

Diego: You must think I care.

Crash: You should. What if Manny went missing?

Diego: I would think he's a big enough boy to take care of himself.

Crash: Well...C'mon, help me! He's my brother! What would you do if your brother went missing?

Diego: I'd be worried for the people he'd put at risk by being at large.

Crash: Oh yeah. It'd "be in his blood to be mean". I forgot.

Diego: Yes, well, thankfully, no one has to worry about him anymore. (leaves Crash inches behind as Crash's pace slows in response)  
Crash: What's that mean? You kill him?

Diego: Nah. He tried to kill me. But it backfired.

Crash: Oh...Oh, man, I'm sorry.

Diego: Don't start.

Crash: Change of topic?

Diego: No, just shut up.

Crash: Yes, sir.

(Scene fades into another; in which Manny, Ellie, Peaches and Sid are walking on the blanket of white. The snow before them is unused. Manny and Ellie have locked trunks. Sid is sitting on Ellie's left tusk, furthest from Manny; with Peaches on her right tusk, closest to Manny)  
Peaches: I'll say it again. We're going the wrong way; there are no prints.

Manny: There weren't prints anywhere. We just need to keep going. And no, Ellie, we are not going to split up.

Ellie (beginning to cry): You don't need to be so mean!

Manny: I wasn't being so mean; I simply answered your question before you asked. If I were being mean, I would've split up without telling you.

(Sid and Peaches look at each other)  
Ellie: I wasn't going to ask!

Manny: Oh.

Sid: I was going to.

Manny: Of course you were. 'Cuz you're a pest.

Ellie: So if I'd asked...?

Manny: If you'd asked...y-you'd be...curious.

Ellie: You know what, this was a bad idea. Whose bright idea was this?

Peaches/Sid/Manny: Yours.

Ellie (tugging futilely on Manny's trunk with her own): Well, it was a bad idea. Let's turn back, all of us, right now.

Manny: What about Crash and Eddie? I'm off the hook, just like that?

Ellie: If you don't want to be with me, just say so!

Manny: I do want to be with you! But Crash and Eddie...I mean, come on, why are they a package deal? Why are you guys joined at the hip?

Ellie: 'Cuz we're family; why else?  
Manny: You're not family! Your family deserted you. These guys are just your lifelong babysitting charges.  
Peaches (upset): Don't yell at Mommy!  
Manny (fed up): Don't yell at Daddy.

Peaches: Sorry, Dad.  
(Manny pauses and looks around, certain he feels something is very wrong. Acting on instinct, he slows down and falls behind Ellie. She notices and turns to face him. Only seconds later, the two are ambushed in an avalanche. Manny's gigantic structure prevents Ellie from being hit; and is also heavy enough to keep him in one spot as the snow strikes him. What doesn't hit him, continues to roll down the hill; picking up speed. Ellie is crouched on the ground; tucking Sid and Peaches close to her by using her trunk. But when the avalanche has passed; only Manny, Sid, and Ellie are still together. Ellie stands slowly, utters her shocked thanks to Manny; and picks up a stricken, useless Sid with her trunk. Ellie and Manny look around, frantically calling Peaches' name as the "camera" quickly pans out, remaining focused on them. Their voices grow quieter until it seems silent. Five seconds follow before "camera" speeds ahead; leaving Ellie, Manny, Sid and Peaches behind. "Camera" finds and focuses on Diego and Crash; approaching the forest's exit)  
Crash (on Diego's back): I spy with my little eye...  
Diego (pausing in tracks): Shh.

Crash: Just trying to pass the time.

Diego: Shut up! (Left ear flickers in the direction behind them; Diego looks over left shoulder, then turns without looking away)  
Lenny: Why's there a supersized rat with ya?

Diego: In case I get hungry. What's it to you?

Lenny (circling): Just wondering why you haven't killed it yet. If it's willpower you lack... Maybe consider hiring someone with more courage. (Stops in front of Diego, their eyes lock. Before anyone can say or do anything else; Zeke and Oscar appear from another path's exit in the forest. They look severely troubled)  
Oscar: Take cover!  
Zeke/Oscar: Avalanche!  
(Diego, able to hear the truth for himself, runs alongside his rivals; who soon turn right. Diego, still packing along Crash, keeps going straight. The avalanche chases him until he slides down a lenient slope and jumps onto the narrow ledge beside it, to the left. The walls of heavy snow crash down the slope and fall off the cliff into the foggy, endless white far below. Diego is crouched on the ledge; his front and hind right paws clutching at the very edge. Almost ten seconds later, the snow stops falling. Diego waits approximately five more seconds before jumping onto the ledge and onto higher ground, facing the way from which he had come. Tiny clumps of snow still roll down the hill; but all is otherwise silent. Diego turns to his left and moves quickly. He is, like the ambience of the atmosphere, silent. He looks very disturbed; and as he proceeds, he sees two hills that are oddly shaped. He brushes off the snow and sees Zeke and Oscar lying in the place of the snow. Both Zeke and Oscar stiff and unmoving.)

Crash (viewed from the front; head poking out over Diego's): Are they...dead?  
(In the background, Lenny is seen jumping out a tree and landing in the snow; creating a cloud of white and a thump loud enough to get the attention of both Diego and Crash. Diego turns and Crash jumps off Diego's head as Lenny stands and shakes himself off; then Lenny turns to face them)  
Lenny: They should be. That snow creamed them.

Diego: Maybe if they practiced running...

(Crash smiles)  
Lenny: Whatever. I think the adrenaline would be enough.

Diego: In that scenario they didn't really want to outrun it.  
(Crash snickers. Lenny looks at Crash in disgust, rolls his eyes, and turns to face Zeke and Oscar. He pushes twice against Zeke's shoulder with his paw, but gets no response. He pushes once more on Zeke and gives up)  
Lenny: They suffocated.

Diego: Gee, you think?  
Lenny: I had to make sure.

Diego (sarcastic but, as usual, quiet): Sure you did. After all, they did run a little; they could just be sleeping.

Lenny: You just go ahead and keep making jokes, Diego. But no one likes bad humor in the long run.

Crash: I liked the jokes...

Diego (in boredom): Yeah, that's nice. (turns to Lenny): And out of everyone I've ever known, you're the second biggest kiss-ass.  
Lenny: So. Just the two of us. Great.

Diego: No, no, I'm on the Funny Stuff list. It's just you and Sid on the Kiss Ass list.

(Lenny pounces on him with absolutely no warning; with enough force to knock Diego into the tree behind him. He connects headfirst and lands hard. Lenny steps back and observes the unconscious tiger before smiling...)  
Lenny (over right shoulder to Crash): Hey, he's right. That is funny. (leaves)  
(Scene of Crash rushing to Diego's side fades into next scene; in which Peaches is sprawled out on the floor of an underground cave; her trunk tied to something secured to the wall. The cracks in the cave's ceiling are large enough to let in some daylight; which illuminates the cave with a dim light. Peaches awakens...)  
Peaches (pulling self into a sitting position): You again!  
Pachyrhinosaurus: You remembered.

Peaches: Of course I do. You're the jerk who gave my mom a hard time.

Pachyrhinosaurus: I'd watch that tone, little girl. I'm in charge of your food until your parents arrive.

Peaches: Actually, sir, I'm really not that little. I'm almost two years old - in animal years, of course. In human years I'd be roughly ten years and...And I just noticed how little you seem to be interested in that.

Pachyrhinosaurus: You catch on fast, kid. But...tell you what, if I for some reason decide to let you live; I'll tell the teacher what you just said and who knows? Maybe you'll be a passable student.

Peaches: You don't even know my teacher. And, judging from what I know about you so far, I wouldn't dare introduce you. And FYI, I am more than just "a passable student".

Pachyrhinosaurus: Okay, then...I'll call you Top Notch. So tell me, wee genius, how come animals reach adulthood in as little as four years; whereas humans take up to about twenty?

Peaches: You must've seen a human.

Pachyrhinosaurus: A whole pack. They ain't friendly.

Peaches: Oh, and you're so great; taking me away from my family? What did I ever do?

Pachyrhinosaurus: Talk back, for one thing. Dawdle, for another. I'm still waiting for an answer.

Peaches (with sigh): As far as I'm concerned; humans age more slowly than we do because their lifespans are longer.

Pachyrhinosaurus: Huh...You know, that's the first opinion I heard that didn't sound ridiculous.

Peaches: Maybe you need to widen your social circle.

Pachyrhinosaurus (change of tone): Dang. I wish my kid had talked back.

Peaches: Why?

Pachyrhinosaurus: Well, it's adult conversation!  
(Silence as Peaches smiles)  
Pachyrhinosaurus (untying Peaches' trunk from restraints): You know what, it'd be a shame to let a mind like yours die young. The exit's that way. (points)

Peaches (happily): Thanks, sir! (leaves freely)  
Hoplitosaurus (coming out from shadows at last): You're all heart, Monty.  
Pachyrhinosaurus: What do you mean?

Hoplitosaurus: You got mine too.

(2 seconds of silence follow as Pachyrhinosaurus catches on and smiles. Scene fades into another; in which Peaches is standing on the ground above the cave from which she had just left. She looks around and, following her instincts, takes the skinny path to her right; which leads her into the forest. She follows the same trail until she comes out the other way; and follows the half-buried footsteps she finds in the snow. Doing so, she finds Crash, desperately trying to revive an unconscious Diego. Surprised and curious, Peaches approaches as quickly as she can...)  
Peaches: Am I glad I found you! What happened?

Crash: Lenny happened. Diego compared him to Sid and he freaked out. (change of tone) Hey, why are you all the way out here?

Peaches: Mom and Dad were relocating me to some...big place with some other mammoths. But, then this avalanche came along and I was kidnapped in the middle of the chaos. But my kidnapper was a pushover and he let me go.

Crash: Yikes. Not everyday you hear that.

Peaches: No kidding. I'll be the coolest kid at my new school!  
Crash: Not like your IQ is low enough to need it...

Peaches: Aw, thanks. You know, I really hope Mom and - (stops short as Diego, sitting up so quickly that Crash jerks in response, grabs Peaches by the trunk. He pulls her down to the ground, using the leverage he gains to sit up. He pins her down, at which point Crash regains control and is able to react...)

Crash: Stop! Let 'er go!  
(Diego roars; the sounds are enough to guide Manny, Ellie and Sid to the quarreling trio. Manny uses his trunk to pull Diego to a safe distance; Peaches hurries to the safety of her mother's reach)

Manny (keeping Diego suspended in the air): What's wrong with you?

Sid (sounding happy, leaning against Ellie): Boy, I never thought I'd see Manny upset at Diego.

(Emitting a nasty growl, Diego reaches out and slashes Manny's trunk with his claws. Manny grimaces and then glares; and Diego simply eyeballs him)

Ellie (disappointed): Diego. How could you do that to him? You guys are a team!

Diego (quietly): I don't know him.  
Sid: You've known him for...at least...two and a half years!

Diego (as Manny releases him): You must have me mistaken for someone else. I wouldn't be with a herd unless it consisted of my own kind. (turns and heads toward the forest)  
Manny: Fine then. We only have to look for Eddie now.

Ellie: But...Diego's been with us forever.

Peaches: That "forever" is really a theoretical thing, Mom. He couldn't have been born in the same womb, now could he?

Ellie (smiling): Oh, you smart-aleck, you know what I mean.

Peaches: Yeah...But for a future reference, there is a right way and there is a wrong way to say it.

Ellie (smile fading): Oh good grief.

Sid: Kid's got a point.

Manny (sarcastically, rolling eyes): Yeah. You've always said things the right way.

Crash: Uh-oh...

Manny/Ellie/Sid/Peaches (anxiously): What?

Crash: Those other guys Diego knows. They're evil.

Sid: So? That doesn't affect us.

Crash: Maybe not directly; but Diego doesn't even remember them. What if he goes back?

Manny: We go without him.

Ellie: What?!

Sid: He told me himself, it's in his blood to be mean.

Manny: That was at a time when he knew very well who you are. Frankly if your hygiene was better, I would eat you.  
Ellie: Manny, that's ridiculous.

Manny: Well, you've got to understand it from my point of view. Sid's -

Ellie: I'm not talking about Sid; I'm talking about Diego. For God's sake, you have your memory! Everything Diego's said to you, that just...doesn't mean anything to you, does it?

Manny: Hey, if he comes back, I'm all for it. But for all he knows, we were just trying to lead him right into a trap. Now if you still want to bother him and screw up the mess, go for it. But if you do, you are going alone.

Sid: Bad move, buddy...

Ellie: No, Sid, it's fine. He's just saying, with his own words, he trusts I can do it.

Manny: If I meant that, I would've said that.

Peaches: You'd come back, right?

Ellie: Of course I will. But for now you gotta stay with Daddy.

(Sid and Crash begin to entertain Peaches so Manny and Ellie can talk...)  
Manny: If anyone here is being ridiculous, it's you. You're a pregnant old mammoth and nothing else and you want to go up against a wild tiger who doesn't remember you.

Ellie: Well, I like that wild tiger and every second you hold me back, he gets further away and Peaches loses her uncle Diego!  
Manny: He's not family!

Ellie: Well not to you. I'm going.

Manny (as Ellie begins to push past him): You can't go.

Ellie (not listening): Sure I can.

Manny: Ellie, get back here! Ellie!  
Sid: Manny?

(Manny looks down at him)  
Sid: It's up for debate. (stares at Manny)  
(Manny grabs Sid with his trunk and throws him almost ten feet away over his shoulder. Ellie catches him with her own trunk and turns...)  
Ellie (walking huffily over to Manny): You know what, Manny? I've had it with you! (gently setting Sid down, she continues) You accepted me when I thought I was a possum, which you later helped me realize I wasn't. Even Crash and Eddie grew on you. You're open-minded enough to let Diego walk; but yet you can't teach Sid to be more like you when it's all he wants! (everyone is shocked) And the only reason he gets to you so much is because he tries to be likeable whereas you just...do things and say things without considering anyone else!

Manny: Okay, let me stop you right there. I don't know if this pregnancy is what's doing this to you; but in case you've gone blind and deaf, Sid is the one that says and does things without any consideration. Yes, he tries to be likeable and helpful, but it never works. He's always been a hateful little nuisance and he's constantly in the way. And the reason he tries to be like me is because he has too little character to be unique. And - you've had enough of me? Seriously? You've had - I've dealt with your hissy fits and tears for almost two gruelling, endless weeks. The only thing you're doing by walking away is giving the rest of us a chance to hear ourselves think!

(Stunned silence as his voice echoes)  
Ellie (leaving and taking Peaches with her): Well. Think about that.

(Silence continues. Finally, Crash drops to all fours and bounds after her. Alone with Manny, Sid looks slowly up at him. Manny's already looking at him. Sid looks quickly away and then looks at Crash's departing figure in resignation. Without a single word of protest from Manny; Sid freely follows Ellie, Peaches and Crash. Manny turns in the opposite direction and begins to walk without looking back. "Camera" shows Manny in a front view and shows Sid in the background; and then the "camera" pans upward to the sky before there is a white flash and the next scene fades in; and Diego is seen prowling sneakily through a maze of tall boulders. Some long grasses poke out from the snow. Diego hears rustling and creeps closer to the movement. He climbs up the boulder in his way; silent except for the crunch of snow under his paws as he makes his way up the rock. Zeke, alive but severely injured, sees Diego's shadow and looks up...)  
Zeke: Oh, Diego. Oh, thank goodness. Listen, I need your help.

(Diego is unresponsive; simply looking at him with his ears strained in two different directions...)  
Zeke: You okay? You're actin' weird.

(Diego crouches, preparing to attack. Zeke knows what is about to happen and is unable to move even as Diego jumps off the boulder and lands only hairs away from him. As Diego bares his fangs; Zeke tries to explain...)  
Zeke (pushing Diego away with his two good paws): Whoa, okay, stop, please - I know we've had our differences but look at how alike we are.

Diego: I'm nothing like you. You're weak - injured - useless. You're food.

Zeke: Yeah, fine, I'm injured. But you can't eat me! You know me!  
Diego: I've never seen you before.

Zeke: You saw me half an hour ago! And yesterday!

Diego: Prove it.

Zeke (taken by surprise): How can I prove it?!  
Diego: Dunno.

Zeke: Diego, if you're going to eat me, at least have the decency to kill me first!  
Diego: If you insist...

Voice: Don't kill him!  
(Diego releases Zeke and looks up as Lenny approaches quickly)  
Lenny: He should be dead already...

Diego: Then I'm doing him a favor.

Lenny: No! (looks at Zeke) Scram.

(Zeke looks shocked and annoyed; but manages to drag himself three inches before fainting from exhaustion and pain. Lenny keeps his glare on Diego even as he turns toward Zeke. He only looks away when his back is fully turned to Diego. Lenny grabs Zeke by the scruff of the neck and walks awkwardly away; letting Zeke's broken hind legs drag on the ground. With a short growl of resignation; Diego turns and goes the way he came; crawling into the tall grasses and disappearing.)

(With no transition, next scene is shown; in which Ellie, Peaches, Sid, and Crash are walking...)  
Ellie: After all that. After all we've been through, he has the nerve - the downright nerve - to put down not just Sid, but my brothers. "Lifelong babysitting charges"? What on God's green earth gives him the right to be so discriminating? And while I'm pregnant with our second child! How dare he!

Peaches: Great, so you wouldn't have fought for me?

Ellie (not even looking at her): Of course I would. But it's worse this way, because you cemented us as a family. And apparently that just means nothing to your father.

Peaches: You think I'm worthless to him?

Ellie: No! Good grief, stop making my problems your own. Look, sweetie, all I mean is, if this had happened while I was pregnant with you; you wouldn't be going through it like you are.  
Sid: And this couldn't have happened at a worse time for Diego.

Ellie: What do you mean?

Sid: He's crushin' on you. Big time.

Ellie: What? You're crazy.

Sid: He denies it...but I pretty much caught him redhanded.

Ellie (suspicious): Doing what?

(Everyone is looking at Sid)  
Sid: I think I misspoke.

Crash (quietly, to Peaches): Yeah...It started with "Hi, I'm Sid"...

(Peaches giggles)  
(Ellie tilts her head and Sid, Crash and Peaches fall off her tusks. As they land, snow explodes around them and Ellie looks around; looking confused...)  
Ellie: This doesn't make any sense.

(Sid climbs on top of Peaches and Crash climbs on top of Sid)  
Crash: Of course it doesn't. You're going east; you want to go west.

Ellie: Really?

Crash (getting onto Ellie's right tusk): Yeah. Mammoth Mile is easterly.

Sid (struggling to sit beside Crash): Mammoth Mile?

Crash: Yeah. If it's more mammoths you want; that is the place to go. New mammoths travel there all the time.

Ellie: All the time? I thought there were only seven left.

Crash: That's if you go to Mammoth Caves, down south. Big difference.

Ellie (turning right): Boy, what would I do without him, huh, Sid?

Sid: He lost me at "easterly".

Peaches: But Dad's still thinking we're going to Mammoth Caves!  
Ellie: Oh, sweetie, I doubt he's coming with us.

(Peaches looks down at the ground, eyes welling up. Ellie doesn't even notice as she lifts Peaches onto her left tusk...)  
Ellie (as Peaches curls up against her tusk; holding onto it by wrapping her trunk around it): Okay! Mammoth Mile, here we come!

Sid: Crash, buddy, you got to be her...guide, or whatever.

Crash (rolling eyes): Oh, that hasn't started yet. Okay. Remind me why you didn't stay with Manny?

Sid: He said he would've eaten me.

(Pause)  
Crash: I'm still waiting for an answer.

Sid: Yeesh! First Manny's intelligence, now his mood has rubbed off on you. You, my friend, are too impressionable.

Crash (quietly, to the back of Peaches' head): You hearing this guy? I'm impressionable. (5 second pause) Peaches?

Peaches (voice shrill and upset; an echo is heard): I heard!

(Crash looks at Sid in shock)  
Sid (with shrug): Hey, she's at that age.

(2 second pause. Scene then fades into next; in which Ellie, Sid, Crash and Peaches are settled down. Peaches, Sid and Crash are huddled together in a small hut made by a boulder leaning against a tree behind it; and Ellie is lying down facing them. The night sky is dark; with many tiny stars and one big moon smattered about...)  
Ellie: Well! I'd say we're doing pretty well. Aren't we, Peaches?

(Peaches doesn't answer)  
Ellie: Yeah. That's the spirit. We're doing well!  
Sid: I don't think she's up to talking.

Crash: Aren't you smart.

Ellie: Crash, be nice... (turns to Peaches and tries again) You know, sweetie, if this is all about the baby thing...

Peaches: No.

Ellie: Then what...?

Peaches (curling into a ball and facing away from Ellie): I'm too tired to talk.

Ellie: Oh. Okay. Goodnight...

(Peaches doesn't answer)  
Ellie: Goodnight...  
(No reply)  
Ellie (to Crash and Sid): Okay, that's a bad sign.

Sid: Oh, she's just like her father that way. I remember the days when he wouldn't even acknowledge me.

Crash: Is it better, the way he acknowledges you today?

Sid: Yeah. At least he can stand to look at me.

Crash: You're on his menu.

Sid: I also remember a time when he put you on Diego's.  
(Peaches sighs heavily; hut falls silent. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Diego is walking across a long, shallow puddle. Looking up at the moon, his eyes glow; but return to normal when he casts a glance over his left shoulder. His attention is diverted from the noise he thought he heard by a sudden movement straight ahead. He breaks into a trot and splashes out of the puddle and onto dry land. He swiftly drops into a crouching position beside a tree and peers through the foliage. When he sees the deer, he flies from his hiding place and the chase begins. It ends quickly when Diego pounces on the fleeing deer and it speaks to him...)  
Gazelle: You kiddin' me? What'd I do, what'd I do?  
Diego: You drew breath. Prey.

Gazelle: Prey?! I'm your pal!  
Diego: 'Course you are. Just like that stupid sloth and misguided mammoth. I'm everyone's friend, huh?  
Gazelle: Yes!  
(Pause)  
Diego (uncertainly): Who am I?  
Gazelle (giving him odd look): You're...Diego. Just like when you drew first breath.  
Diego: ...I was afraid that sloth was talkin' to me.

Gazelle: Man, you're really messed up!  
(Diego glares)  
Gazelle: Sorry. But...Okay, which way is south?  
Diego (looking south): That way.  
Gazelle: Okay, some of you is messed up.  
Diego: Look, you...gangly goof...Your kind was bred to give my kind meat. There are two types of beings in this word - predator and prey. The sooner you accept what you are; the sooner you'll be relieved of your task.  
Gazelle: So you're willin' to throw everythin' away 'cuz you're some kind'a monster?  
Diego: Predators can be called monsters, yes.  
Gazelle: But...I don't -  
Diego (with sigh): You don't want to die. Jeez, this planet would be wiped clean of anything with a heartbeat if my kind had that type of attitude.  
Gazelle: Well, thank goodness you're of the monster kind.  
Diego: Tell me about it.  
(Next scene immediately shows Eddie turning in his place as he hears the gazelle's scream. Then Ellie is shown sleepily lifting her head as the echo resonates in her direction...)  
Peaches: What was that?  
Ellie: I don't know.  
Sid: Whatever it was, it sounded close.  
(Crash hits him as Peaches rolls over to face Ellie with wide eyes)  
Peaches: How close?  
Ellie: Not that close.  
Sid: Just to be sure, Ellie; you should probably face the opening of the cave in case it gets even closer.  
Crash (teeth gritted): Sid, shut up.  
Sid: What? I'm expressing concern, common sense and safety.  
Crash: If you were expressing safety and common sense, you wouldn't stay in a dark room in my presence.  
Sid: Ellie, he's threatening me!  
Ellie (as Peaches curls into a ball facing the wall): Yes, Sid, and I won't stop him.  
Sid: Hey, what happened to the girl who rescued me from being Manny's dinner?  
Ellie: Oh, come on, he's just razzing you! Besides, no animal in their right mind would have you in his mouth.  
Crash: I didn't say I'd eat him.  
Peaches (getting up and walking toward cave entrance): Oh, shut up! Mom, it's either me or Sid.  
Ellie (trapping Peaches): We're not going anywhere tonight.  
Peaches: Fine, I'll go alone.  
Ellie: No. I don't think so.  
Peaches: Alright, I'll take one person with me; but that's my limit.  
Ellie (staring at Peaches): Alright. Crash, you go.  
Crash: Why me?  
Ellie: Because she's mad at me and Sid doesn't even know what "easterly" means!  
Crash: But...we're...family.  
Ellie: We'd have to be of the same species for that to work; don't you think?  
Crash: Oh...Yeah, sure...C'mon, Peaches...  
Sid (alone with Ellie): Wow. Kind of bad parenting on your part, huh?  
Ellie: No, sweetie, it'll be good for Peaches to get away from me. And when she realizes it's harder to grow up so young; I'll be right there.  
Sid: What?  
Ellie (grabbing him with trunk): Never mind. (follows Crash and Peaches)

(At dawn...)  
Peaches: Wow. I'm starting to feel like a new mammoth!  
Crash: I'm starting to feel like everything I've shared with Ellie has all been a joke.  
Peaches: And isn't it great to get away from Sid?  
Crash: I'd like it more if Ellie were here and just left Sid behind...  
Peaches: Why?

Crash: Look at us. We're too tiny to survive on our own!  
Peaches: Hey, we've done pretty well for the first three hours.  
Crash: You're right. We rule the wild.  
Peaches (hurt): You don't mean that.  
Crash: Of course not.  
Peaches: Look, just because you think we're dead meat -  
Crash: You mind saying that a little louder? I don't think the dinosaurs heard.  
Peaches: Look, in this world there are two types of beings - predator and prey. But even the predators of us have predators of their own! It's all one nasty system.  
Crash: Who taught you that?  
Peaches: Well - actually, it was Diego who taught Dad, then Dad taught me - but it's all true! You can't deny it! ...Well, with free will you could, all you wanted, in fact; but you'd be a fool to try and run from the facts of life considering how you'll never rid of them -  
Crash: Peaches, what do you dream of?  
Peaches: Inaccurate. The mind dreams; and when it does, it is simply your fantasy or fear displayed in a visual and unexplainable, sometimes even humorous, manner. If I could dream, on the other hand, I'd choose to dream of just the unexplainable; because even an unconscious mind can think up solutions to the hardest problems -  
Crash: Peaches?  
Peaches: Yes.  
Crash: What was your last dream about?  
Peaches: Dad's brainwaves and speech patterns had been copied after he was kidnapped by aliens and he was cloned to save his species; and the shock of the event killed him and all his clones and their spirits came back to haunt us; and his spirit went into my body and I yelled at Mom thinking I was Dad.  
(3 second pause)  
Peaches: Why?  
Crash: Just...wondering what a weird girl like yourself would come up with when trying to sleep.  
Peaches: Boy. You were just my mom's lifelong sitting charge - which technically makes you my equal - yet you don't like me.  
Crash: I'm not your equal.  
Peaches: And how not?  
Crash: You still have your mother.  
Peaches: Yes. But I'm opting out. Like your mother did. That makes your mom and my mom both childless.  
Crash: I'm still not your equal. Even if my mom were still alive; only one of our moms would be pregnant.  
Peaches: Are you suggesting I'm being replaced?  
Crash: Well, the term would be "gaining a sibling" had you not opted out.  
Peaches: Oh...Why couldn't Mom have joined me and left Sid and you behind...?  
Crash: You said you'd take one. You didn't say who you'd take.  
Peaches: Always my first mistake; I never speak my mind enough.  
Crash: Can I change the topic?  
Peaches: Please.  
Crash: We're going south.  
(Peaches catches on and looks in interest down at Crash; who nods once, a gesture that is enough to make her smile. Scene fades into next; in which Oscar is helping Lenny track prints...)  
Lenny: Well? Where is he?  
Oscar: Well, these tracks definitely belong to one of ours. But the direction...it doesn't make any sense.  
Lenny: You'd better make some sense out of it.  
Oscar: I'm trying. But these can't be Diego's tracks. He lives in the south - these tracks go north; and more than two miles out of his way. He wouldn't go so far to eat something.  
Lenny (realizing): He would if he didn't know where he lived...  
Oscar: What?  
Lenny: This...may be my fault.  
Oscar: Then you do the tracking!  
Lenny (tracking): Okay. Okay, these prints definitely belong to Diego. But judging from the spaces between each print; he was going fast. He had a purpose of some sort - which obviously means he knows very well who he is.  
Oscar: Then explain their direction.  
Lenny: Well...  
Oscar: And how you do know he wasn't just being...chased by...a bear? He wouldn't stop and ask it for directions; he'd run! Hence "chase"!  
Lenny: You fool, if he was being chased by a bear; we'd see his prints too. And even if Diego lost all his memories; he'd still be smart enough to relearn his directions.  
Oscar: "If he lost all his memories"?  
Lenny: Yes.  
Oscar: So much for being confident about the tracks...Shut up and let me track. I'll find him a lot faster than you could.  
Lenny (smiling): Well, alright. If you insist.  
(Much later, when the sky is darker and the shadows have traveled...)  
Lenny: There he is!  
(Lenny leads Oscar to the familiar shape near the tree; but when they get closer, they see it's Zeke...)  
Oscar: There you are!  
Lenny: I thought I left you back at the cave.  
Zeke: You did. When you didn't come back; I went to find some food. Then I got lost... bumped into Diego -  
Oscar: Where is he?

Zeke: Gee, I don't know. Let me just travel back in time and ask him about his future plans.  
Oscar: Well...what did he say?  
Zeke: Not much.  
Lenny: Surprise, surprise...  
Zeke: Just called me weak, injured, and useless - said I was food - and tried biting me. I stopped him - that's all I know.  
Oscar: All you know or all you'll admit?  
Lenny: All he knows. I was there, lay off.  
Oscar: Fine.  
Lenny: And keep tracking! We don't have all day.  
Zeke (as Oscar tracks): Technically you do.  
Lenny: No, Zeke, you have all day. We're the useful ones.  
Zeke: What happened to "lay off"?  
Lenny: That rule only applies to someone who's only skilled in the hunting field.  
Zeke: Well - hey, look, you can't just leave me here!  
Lenny: Yes, we can. And the tribe law is, when one goes down; the others keep going. You understand, it's our custom.  
Zeke: I know, but what if -  
Oscar (tracking): Hey Lenny! I have the sloth's scent!  
Lenny (joining): You sure it's him?  
Oscar (tracking): There's really no mistaking it. (pauses) Uh-oh.  
Lenny: What?  
Oscar: I lost it. Now it's just...mammoth.  
Lenny (thinking): Follow it anyway. (follows Oscar after the tracks) Hurry! (both begin to run; scene fades into next, in which Manny is walking alone. He looks deep in thought and in a negative mood; and his expression gets worse when he sees his reflection in a thawing pond...)  
_Ellie (from flashback): Is it just me, or is it warmer?  
_(Manny submerges the end tip of his trunk in the water; scaring a fish. His reflection simultaneously ripples. When the waves in the water slow to a stop; he turns away from the pond and pauses; looking at Lenny and Oscar, who stand a few feet away...)  
Oscar: I told you it was just him! We have a problem!  
Lenny: You'll have an even bigger one if you don't shut up. (Lenny moves forward. As Manny braces himself for an attack; Lenny stops and observes him...)  
Lenny: Ease up! You think I want to take you on?  
Manny: It wouldn't be the first time you've tried.

Lenny (remaining in his place): Well, ease up. I just want to ask you a few questions.

Manny: I'll allow you two; so ask carefully.  
Lenny: Okay...First question. Where's Diego?  
Manny: Don't know. Lost his memory - left the group. Said he'd only acknowledge his kind.  
Oscar: You see, Lenny? You play too rough!  
Lenny: Ah, he's just a sissy.  
Oscar: He was the best out of us! He was supposed to be Soto's replacement; not you!  
Lenny: Don't get all drama-queenly on me. (looks to Manny; sees him walking away) Hey!  
Manny (irritably): What?

Lenny: I didn't ask the second question.

Manny: Not my problem.  
Lenny (catching up to Manny): Where's your family?  
Manny: Don't know.  
Oscar: Just so we're clear - does that one count as a question...?  
Manny: Yes. Now buzz off.

Oscar (quietly to Lenny; as they turn to leave): You didn't ask wisely enough.  
Lenny: Yes I did. He's just too stubborn to answer. (Increases speed of pace, leaving Oscar behind. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Diego is seen awakening from his slumber spot on the ground. He stretches quickly and looks left, then right, then behind him; at which point he turns to face that direction. He sees nothing familiar; so turns into a different direction and breaks into a trot. Scene fades into the next; in which Diego is seen walking through a stretch of a seemingly deserted marsh. "Camera" swivels to face Diego's destination; in which many, many mammoths are stretched upon the marsh...)  
Female mammoth: Trespasser! We've got a trespasser over here!  
(All mammoths stop and look right at Diego)  
Diego (to agitated female mammoth): Don't kid yourself.  
Male mammoth: You aren't allowed in Mammoth Mile.

Diego: I don't want to be. It's just in my way.

Different male mammoth: You heard the man. No sabers.  
Ellie (from behind): Let him through, guys. He probably wants to be here less than you want him to be.

(Diego looks over left shoulder. Sid is on her right tusk...)  
Sid: Do you know who you are now, buddy?  
(Diego looks around to see if someone will answer)  
Sid: No, you! Th-the tiger.

Diego (after examining himself): Who, me?  
Different female mammoth (tentatively): ...Ellie?  
(Ellie turns to see a dark gray mammoth with pale blue eyes)  
Ellie: Aia...?  
Aia: Yeah, yes!  
Sid: Who?  
Aia: Her niece!  
Sid (looking up at Ellie): You have a niece?

Ellie (irritably): One would know, unless being abandoned...

Sid (looking upset): Hey, that was really uncalled for.

Ellie (close to tears): I'm sorry!  
Aia: What's going...on...?  
Sid: She's pregnant. Very...pregnant.

Ellie: Is that a slam against my face?!  
Sid: Well! You're certainly no possum.

Aia (as Ellie makes a booing sound): Hey, hey, no. Knock that off.  
(Ellie drops Sid to the marsh; the impact makes a wet sound. Aia, along with some other mammoths, look horrified)  
Ellie (innocently): Like that?  
Sid: Yes...fine...I'll take it...It's the nicest she's been all day.

(Sid scrambles out of the way as Ellie tries stepping on him. He takes cover near Aia's front right leg...)  
Aia: Ellie. Remember what your mama used to say - patience is a virtue.

Ellie: Well, you sit him for awhile and see how much patience you can keep.

Sid: More than she's lost...Bet my life on it...

Ellie: What did you just say?  
Sid (embarrassed): I - uh...  
Ellie: You be glad I haven't dried you up like a fruit yet.

Sid: Wha -

Ellie: I'll give Manny credit for one thing - he went wrong with you.

Aia: Now wait a minute; his family sounds awful! What if it was them?  
Ellie (lashing out): Then I'll eat sticks!  
(Pause)  
Sid: That's the pregnancy talking. I'm just gonna ignore that and forgive ya.

Aia: Right on, little man.

Ellie (in indifferent resignation): Whatever. See ya later. (leaves)  
Sid: Just like that? "Hi, niece; 'bye, niece?"  
Aia: I'd prefer waiting 'til she's in a better mood anyway.

(Scene fades into next; in which Crash and Peaches are walking...)  
Crash: My feet are killing me!  
Peaches: How much longer do they intend to delay it...  
(Crash grunts; short delay follows)  
Peaches: Okay, it's taken longer than it should and I have no clue where we are; which has never happened before. I'm hungry, I'm wet, I'm tired; and there is no sign of life anywhere...

Crash: I told you we wouldn't be able to do it.

Peaches: For the record, you say a lot of things.  
Crash: Well, it's sort of - hey!  
(Peaches giggles, scene fades into next; in which Manny's walk leads him to the injured and immobile Zeke, who hears Manny's quiet jibber-jabber to self...)  
Manny: Stupid... (mocking voice) "That's ridiculous!" (normal voice) Is it so ridiculous to protect your pregnant wife from a wild hungry animal? Stupid Lenny, knockin' the sense outta Diego. Gonna cave his head in next time I see him.

Zeke: Diego?  
(Confused, Manny stops and looks around. He spots Zeke...)  
Zeke: He went on down to Mammoth...Uh...Mammoth...Was it Caves or Mile...? Uhh... Caves. Yep. Mammoth Caves. I'm sure he went south.  
Manny: Thanks. (turns to leave)  
Zeke (with inhale): Wait.

(Manny pauses but doesn't turn)  
Zeke (with sigh): Can you...end me?  
(Manny turns)  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Manny is shown walking south. "Camera" then pans past Manny and zooms in on Zeke...)  
Zeke (muttering): Stupid mammoth.  
(Scene fades into next; in which Sid and the mammoths are cheering as Ellie uses her trunk to make a cradle for her newborn baby...)  
Sid: So? Girl or boy?  
Ellie: Girl. That or a boy who'll grow up to at least be smart.

Aia: Can I see?

(Ellie lets Aia see)  
Aia: Oh, Ellie, she looks just like you!  
Ellie: Yeah...Kind of...

Aia (scooping up Sid, who makes a weird noise): Alright, c'mon, people. Give the second-time mom some peace!  
(The crowd disappears)

(Nearing noon...)  
Peaches: I spy with my little eye...something that is...big.

Crash (looking around at the trees): Can you give me a better hint?

(Peaches is silent, her gaze remaining focused ahead. Crash looks...)  
Crash: Is that...Ellie?

Peaches: No...This one's different.

Crash: How can you tell?  
Peaches (looking briefly at him): It's ahead of us; not behind, like she was when we last saw her. Plus too big.

Crash: So...it's...Manny?

Peaches (whisper): No. Too big...  
(The silhouette turns then; revealing a frightening shape. Crash whimpers)  
Peaches: Cool!  
Crash (trying to stop her): You can't go over there!  
Peaches: Just try and stop me! (walks eagerly forward) Hello?

(The shape pauses and looks in her direction)  
Crash: Oh, you've done it now, Peaches. We're dead!  
Peaches: Oh, grow up.  
(The shape approaches. The closer it gets, the bigger it gets. Peaches finally grows less confident and steps closer to Crash...)  
Peaches: Okay, maybe we're dead.

Crash: Gee, your emphasis on "Too big" wasn't a good enough hint before you yelled at it?  
Peaches: Knock it off, it'll hate you more...  
Crash: What?

Peaches: Well, come on, who doesn't? At which point you just refer it to Sid.

(Crash forces himself to laugh. The thing, which turns out to be a fully grown female dragon, stops in front of them...)  
Crash: Hey, look at that. Another dino.

Peaches: Dinosaurs don't fly, idiot. This is clearly a dragon.

Crash: Those things are just urban legends.

Peaches: Then I'd like your insight on this.  
Crash: That was my insight. I'm gettin' outta here!  
Voice: And just where do you intend on goin'?  
(Peaches and Crash turn and look. A donkey walks around the side of the dragon...)  
Peaches: Aahh!  
Donkey (startled): What? What?!  
Crash: You talk!  
Voice: He talks a lot.  
(Puss In Boots walks around Dragon)  
Donkey (to Puss In Boots): Am I younger? I feel younger.

Voice: You're the same age, Donkey. Your time zone changes, not you. (Princess Fiona, as an ogress, appears) I tell you, this time machine was the best thing Charming ever invented. (looks up from papers; then sees Peaches and Scrat) Whoa! I guess our time zone was further back than we thought!  
(Shrek appears, looking concerned)  
Donkey: Check out the rat I found! Isn't he big?

Crash: I'm not a rat!

Donkey (disbelievingly): Really?

(Shrek takes booklet from Fiona and flips through it)  
Donkey: Where are we?

Shrek: The Pleistocene Epoch!  
Donkey: The what?

Shrek: The Ice Age.

Peaches: It was historical?

Fiona: It is, for us. It will be in the future, for you.

Peaches: What's that flappy thing?

Shrek (looking at booklet): This?

Peaches: Yeah.

Fiona: It's paper. It comes off of trees.

Crash: Wait, wait, wait! Back it up. Who's Charming - and what's a time machine?!  
Fiona: It lets you travel in time. We've seen our own futures, now the Ice Age...  
Donkey: Yeah! And Charming's this evil prince who's tryin' to kill us all!  
Peaches: So...Why are you using his time machine?

Donkey: He left it unattended!  
Crash: That was silly...

Fiona: What would he do - drag it with him?

(Donkey laughs shortly; but catching Shrek's bored stare, sobers immediately)  
Puss In Boots (to Shrek): Does it say anything in there about housing?

Shrek: No.

Puss In Boots (turning stony look to Crash): Rats.

Fiona: Why?

Puss In Boots: Just curious.

Peaches: Well, now, wait a minute! (gets everyone's attention) We're looking for shelter too. Come with us?

(Fiona looks at Shrek, who shrugs)  
Fiona (looking back at Peaches): We're in.  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Shrek, Fiona, Puss In Boots, Donkey, Peaches, and Crash are huddled together on Dragon's back as she flies over land and water...)  
Shrek (making Fiona worried): This place is a nightmare!

(Scene shows Dragon disappearing over some forestry before "camera" pans down to Manny. Not so far down below; he has seen her shadow on the ground and has looked up just in time to see her vanish into the treeline...)  
Manny: Some kind of warhead...  
(Meanwhile, Sid is indulging with a snowball fight with other mammoths...)  
Ellie (watching): Kids.  
Aia: He's a grown man, Ellie. Let the boy have some fun.  
Ellie: How can he even focus on fun after what's happened?

Aia: What happened?

Ellie: Everyone I love is either missing or separated!  
Aia: What?!  
Ellie: One of my brothers is missing; the other accompanied my miserable kid as far away from me as she can get; my husband left me because those two brothers of mine are unrelated possums and he can't tolerate it like I needed him to; and, my other friend has amnesia and insists he doesn't know any of us.  
Aia: Ah, Diego.  
Ellie: You know him?  
Aia: Nope. But Sid mentioned him. A few times. Seems to miss him a bit.  
Ellie: We all miss Diego.  
Aia: Yeah?

Ellie: Of course. And much as I try to keep the peace; it's really hard to keep a good head on my shoulders when they keep biting at it.  
Aia: I always did blame Crash and Eddie's mama for that.

Ellie: What? Why?

Aia: C'mon! I met them the day I met you; don't you get it? She dumped those things on you when they were a week old. It's no wonder they don't remember her. You yourself were barely pushing two years!  
Ellie: And because she did that, I had company. If she hadn't -  
Aia: If she hadn't, you'd have been all alone, because your mom did the same to you.  
Ellie: Right.

Aia: Look, Ellie, you love Crash and Eddie like your own. I respect you for that. But...it's a wonder you've held out as long as you have.

Ellie: Just wait a minute! First off, I am not the youngest between the two of us; so you need to quit addressing me as such. And secondly, I've known you for five hours in total. You've known Sid longer already! So on that note; you only know so much about me through him.  
(Aia looks mildly embarrassed)  
Ellie: So tell me, just what did he say to you?  
Aia: Actually...he didn't say anything.  
Ellie: What...  
Aia: Crash and Eddie's mom...Mymom knew her. My mom...told their mom...to hand off her children to you.  
Ellie: What?!  
(3 second pause)  
Ellie: Why tell me after all these years? Why not sooner? I mean, that's my sister you're talking about! She did this?

Aia: ...Yes.  
(5 second pause)  
Ellie: I don't really remember her.  
Aia: Well, she's right over there - (gestures with trunk) ...if you want to set things straight.  
(Ellie looks)  
Aia: Can't spot her?

Ellie: I'm looking at a sea of our own kind; of course I can't.

Aia: You don't need to get snarly with me.

Ellie: I'm not! I'm just...overwhelmed. All these mammoths, a new baby, a niece, now my sister...Are my mom and dad in this crowd too? (laughs)  
(No reply. Ellie looks to see Aia purposely avoiding her gaze, looking flustered. Ellie slowly stops laughing...)  
Ellie: Are they?!  
(Aia looks sheepishly at Ellie)  
Ellie: Aia, if they're here, I have a right to know.

Aia: Fine. (gestures to her left) Your dad's over there, teaching Sid how to read tracks; and your mom... (looks around) ...is hitting on that big...blond mammoth...  
Ellie: Uh-oh. (quickly approaches) Uh, hello?  
(The addressed mammoth, who is black with hazel eyes, looks...)  
Male mammoth: Mind givin' us some privacy? Take Junior elsewhere, 'kay; I'm tryin' to talk to Night here.

Ellie: Yeah. Night, whose husband is right there. (nods)  
Night: You know him?  
Ellie: All his kids do.  
Male mammoth: Whoo, tension! Excuse me. (leaves)  
Night: Thanks a lot. And what do you mean?  
Ellie: Well, Mom, you see, it's like this. You met Dad, popped out three kids, left one of 'em for dead, and now you're lookin' at her.

Night (becoming rigid): Ellie.  
Ellie: Oh, you remember?

(Night opens mouth to say something; but then closes it, glaring)  
Ellie: Well, I guess we should catch up. I have a husband, this is my second baby, and I showed up here thinking you wouldn't. (turns around and walks straight to her father) Hey, Sid, about earlier...

Sid: Oh, hi Ellie!  
(Ellie stares at her father, whose expression changes to remembrance and recognition before he looks at her)  
Sid: Look, these tracks are...two hours old.  
Ellie's father: Yes. Yes, two hours. Good. (leaves, heading toward Night)  
Sid: I am getting seriously better at this.

Ellie: That's great, Sid. (lies down)  
Sid: Hey, what's up?  
(2 second pause)  
Ellie: That was my dad.

(Sid looks shocked)  
Ellie (making Sid look over shoulder): And that's my mom...(points with trunk to her right) And that's my sister, talking to my niece.

Sid: Oh, wow! What a small world!  
Ellie (softly): Yeah...  
(5 second pause)  
Sid: So...what's your kid's name?  
Ellie: I...I don't know. Manny isn't here; how can I name her?

Sid: Well, he kind of inspired Peaches' name.  
Ellie: Yeah...  
Sid: And you can't just let her walk around without a name!  
Ellie: No...I know...  
Sid: And besides, he's heard the name you want for her.  
Ellie: Well...  
Sid: And he isn't the one who was pregnant with her!  
Ellie: Yeah. Yeah, you're right! So meet Tyroko.  
(3 second pause as Sid and Ellie play with Tyroko. Scene fades into next; in which Dragon lands and her six passengers get off...)  
Peaches: Whew! I've never flown before!  
Crash: It was fun.  
Donkey (to Dragon): Aha, you hear that? Nice flyin'. Now what did I say?!  
(Dragon makes noise at him)  
Donkey: Hey, don't you use that tone with me; I been tellin' you all this time!  
Puss In Boots: Hmph. Fighting with each other before even her birth... (catches Dragon's evil eyes) In the rat's time.  
Crash: I'm not a rat!  
(At that exact instant; Lenny, Oscar, and Diego explode out of the bushes. Donkey shrieks in surprise; while everyone else looks over, unruffled. Lenny, Oscar, and Diego run straight across the clearing and disappear into the bushes. Seconds later, Rudy - Buck's old friend - stomps through the foliage; crushing most of it to the ground. He is distracted by Dragon; who is the only thing in the world bigger than Rudy. Rudy, still provoked, roars at Dragon; causing her six passengers to huddle together, staring up in shock. Rudy is quickly scared away when Dragon blows fire at him...)  
Donkey: I hate the Plasticine Apocalypse!  
(Everyone stiffens in shock and fear as the foliage catches fire, making it grow and shoot sky-high)  
Fiona (as she and the others climb back onto Dragon): Let's get out of here!  
(Dragon flies away; heading east. With no transition, next scene is shown; in which Manny is piling logs together to make a shelter. Again, he looks up as Dragon passes...)  
Manny: Great. Return fire. (carefully places another log on his forming cave)  
(Scene fades into next; in which Ellie is distracted from her stargazing when Dragon lands right in front of her. Dragon's passengers get off...)  
Peaches: Mom?  
Ellie: Peaches! (carries Tyroko over to her)  
Peaches: So, she's out, huh?  
Ellie: Out? Sweetie - she isn't a loose tooth.

Peaches: Is she replacing me?  
Ellie: What?

Peaches: Am I not good enough?

Ellie: No! That's not it at all. You're as important to me as Manny, and Diego, and your little sister...Her birth doesn't change anything. Manny and I wanted you to have a friend.

Peaches: Because you don't think I could make them on my own?

Ellie: No! Why do you take everything I say the wrong way?

Peaches: Because what you're doing is stupid.  
Ellie: What...

Peaches: Oh, please, don't give me the clueless bit. You want to have a family, expand your family, secure your family - but you don't even give a crap if Dad doesn't come back? You're basically saying it was all a mistake. Him, me -

Ellie: I am not saying that.

Peaches (unconvinced): Really.  
Ellie: Really!  
Peaches: So then Dad's here? Is that it? You just...up and got him while I was gone?  
Ellie: Well, no, but -  
Peaches: But what? What do you really have to fight for if not family?  
Ellie: Hey, you're here. Tyroko's here.

Peaches: Right! And who helped you with that?

(3 second pause before Shrek's angry voice cuts through the air...)  
Shrek: Are you out of your mind? You saw that dinosaur just as well as I did. (walks after Fiona into clearing)  
Fiona: Yes, and what have they seen before, Shrek? Dragons? Ogres? I want them to be with us where they're supposed to be!  
Shrek: Fiona, you're being irrational -  
Fiona: No! I'm not!  
Shrek (forcing Fiona to turn to face him): Look, I just -  
Fiona: I'm going, Shrek - end of story. (keeps walking, leaving Shrek behind)  
Donkey (popping up from out of nowhere and scaring Ellie): Where is she going?  
Shrek: She's going to magically teleport our kids into this mess.

Donkey: Did she...not see the dinosaur?  
Shrek: Oh, who knows what she's aware of anymore. (leaves, heading in the opposite direction)  
Ellie: You see, sweetie? Sometimes a little break from each other is okay.

Peaches: Fine. Come and get me when yours is over. (follows Shrek alongside Donkey)  
(Ellie sighs. Scene fades into next; in which Diego is making his way up a sloping incline of rocks. As he ascends, his left hind paw loosens a rock; making it clink down the hill. Not too far away; Manny, hearing the noise, opens his eyes just in time to see Diego accomplish the climb. Diego vaguely recognizes him and approaches slowly. Manny, safe from the rain in his hut and not safe from much else, adopts a defensive stance; at which point Diego stops in his tracks...)  
Diego: I passed...your lady friend back at Mammoth Mile.  
Manny: Ellie?  
Diego: Sure. You know she has a niece?  
Manny: She does?!  
Diego: Aia. She's also got some tiny tot to take care of...who apparently really hates her.  
Manny: Our kid? No, our kid doesn't hate her. She's just...lower than herd turd right now.

Diego: She'll be even flatter if this Ellie keeps tryin' to step on her.

Manny: What?!  
Diego: I don't know. That's when I left.  
Manny: Where is this place?  
Diego: Back east. (gestures behind him)  
Manny: Thanks. (leaves)  
(Diego watches him leave; then looks at the sky as thunder snaps across the sky from within the clouds. The tempted Diego's eyes find Manny's shelter and he disappears inside it as the rain begins to fall. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Manny is traipsing east. However, he stops in his tracks to stare out at the wall of fire blocking his path. "Camera" shows the fire before him reflecting in his eyes; meanwhile the fire is spreading to block the path behind him as well. Feeling the heat now from behind, Manny turns and, realizing his situation, looks to both sides for a way out. To his right, he finally spots one area the fire hasn't taken over, and quickly runs out of the cage of fire. He hastily turns once to his right once more and makes his eastward escape. Scene fades into next; in which Peaches, Shrek and Donkey return to the campsite. They settle down with Puss in Boots to Donkey's left and Shrek to his right. Ellie is lying down across from Shrek; with Tyroko snuggled up in her trunk. Peaches places herself next to Crash, who alongside Sid, divides Ellie from her. The other mammoths sleep surrounding Ellie; and Dragon, awake and alert, overlooks them; sitting behind Donkey...)  
Donkey (to Shrek): She'll be back.

Shrek: Yeah. (continues speaking as Puss In Boots - unnoticed by Donkey, as his attention is turned to Shrek - awakens and takes cover from the rain under a motherly Dragon; who curls her tail protectively in front of him) Well, maybe Dragon won't have roasted you to a venison by then.

Donkey (warily): What's that mean, man?  
Shrek: I'm sayin', maybe you two'll be on better ground.  
Donkey: One can hope. Actually I do. I mean she's my wife, of course I do. (Shrek rolls eyes)  
Shrek: Yeah. Better ground. Sitting on snow while it's raining. How much worse could it get?  
(Lightning bolt comes down and strikes the sleeping Night, making her body steam. 4 second pause...)  
Donkey (as Shrek still gapes): Y'had to ask.  
(3 second pause as "camera" remains focused on them. Scene fades into next; in which Fiona and her mother - escorting Fiona's two-year-old triplets in a mobile, roofed crib she intends to give to Ellie - explode into the world of the Ice Age once again in a burst of light behind Manny's shelter. Diego awakens abruptly and aborts his cave to the rain. His growl makes Fiona turn to face him. When she sees him, she faces him; pulling the crib behind her, eyes wide in terror as the wild sabre advances in. 4 second pause...)  
Recorded voice (distracting Diego): _There's a snake in my boot!_  
(Felicia giggles, holding up a pull-string cowboy toy. 2 second pause before Zeke attacks Diego from behind; only able to bite his ankle. Diego's attention shifts to Zeke and Fiona makes her escape. With no transition, scene fades into next; in which Ellie, otherwise all alone, bumps into Fiona and Ellie. She sees their expressions...)  
Ellie (lifting entire crib with trunk): I've got it. What's happening?  
Lillian: A group of inept beasts almost attacked us.  
Ellie: Really?  
Fiona: It was one beast, Mom. He just...got attacked by another.  
Ellie (to Fiona): "Mom"?! Why isn't your mother like you?  
Fiona (interrupting Lillian's unsaid answer): I'd rather not talk about that.  
(They return to camp. Fiona lays down next to Shrek, who acknowledges her with a tense smile and nothing else. Farkle, Fergus and Felicia are kept in the crib to keep Puss In Boots safe in a shelter of his own; and Tyroko is deposited with Puss In Boots...)  
Fiona (looking to her left at Shrek): Now I can focus.  
Shrek: Good.  
(They kiss. Peaches makes a gagging noise; which attracts Ellie's attention to her...)  
Ellie: Peaches? Why're you still up?  
Peaches: Can't sleep.

Ellie: Okay, why are you having such an attitude problem? The grass is always greener on the other side; you'd be unhappy no matter what I'd do.  
Peaches: You want to know why I'm so unhappy?  
Ellie (quickly): Yes.  
Peaches: Are you sure you do?  
Ellie (quickly, irritably): Yes!  
Peaches: Several reasons. I was kidnapped; my family's breaking apart; my grand-mother just got quick-grilled; I'm being replaced with something whose biggest achievement so far is making a new speed record for sleeping; the entire world is filled with dinosaurs and dragons; we're being hunted down by an old friend; we could all die tomorrow and no one gives a flying fart in space about anything I want or think of!  
(Forest fire flame shoots sky-high, appearing over the crest of the hill)  
Peaches (still angry): Oh, look! A fire.

Ellie: Um...just backtrack a bit. What do you mean by "quick-grilled"?  
Peaches: She's dead!  
Ellie: What?! (gets up and approaches Night)  
(Peaches sighs and rolls eyes. As she does so; she catches one lone silhouette making its way up the hill; nothing but the outline of a mammoth against the fire behind it. Peaches cannot and does not look away. The mammoth walks right over to her...)  
Manny (as Peaches gets up slowly): Peaches! Oh, honey, I am so glad to see you!  
Peaches: Daddy! (hugs his leg with her trunk) Daddy, make it stop!  
Manny: Okay, who's suicidal enough to mess with my girl?  
Peaches: It's...Mom.

(Manny, shocked, hesitates only a second before approaching Ellie)  
Ellie (muttering): ...and yet despite all that, this really does serve you right. I mean, please, even God was on my side -  
Manny: Your crew's growin', huh?  
(Ellie spins around)  
Manny: Now why'd you have to go and shake up Peaches like that? I've never seen someone so isolated from her own parents; and that includes -  
Ellie: Manny...  
(2 second silence)  
Ellie (beginning to cry): Mom's dead.  
(4 second silence)  
Manny: Oh...Oh, honey...Um...Oh well...  
(Ellie stares)  
Manny (hastily): I mean - I mean - What I meant was...  
Ellie (expression gentling): Get some rest, Manny. We're both too tired to argue.

Manny: I wish. You made my daughter cry.

Ellie: I made...Wait a minute; so she's only your daughter when she's mad at me? (glare returns)  
Manny: That's not how it is.

Ellie: Oh, okay, so I'm only your wife when I'm happy?  
Manny: No! And you know it doesn't work that way.

Ellie: It doesn't work period if you don't work things out!

Manny (causing others to awaken): I wasn't the one to insist on leaving!  
Ellie (causing Aia to awaken): You didn't act like you loved us, Manny!  
Manny: Oh, so you want me to act!  
Ellie (voice is muffled as "camera" shows Peaches hiding with Puss In Boots and Tyroko as she hugs her baby sister in sheer terror): No, I want you to smarten up and be a better father than yours was!  
Aia (walking past Manny and Ellie): I've had enough. I'm out of here.  
Ellie's Dad: Oh, sure, that's nice. Be just like my wife.  
(Dragon roars long and loud and the entire camp falls deathly quiet. No one moves. 5 second pause...)  
Recorded voice: _You're my favorite deputy!  
_(Felisha's giggle echoes throughout the camp)  
Ellie: Manny...I love you. But...maybe this isn't working.

(2 second pause)  
Manny (quietly): What are you saying?

Ellie: I'm saying...maybe we aren't -

Fiona: Don't say it.  
(Ellie and Manny look at her in irritation)  
Fiona: Don't do that to your kid. Not again.  
Donkey: Yeah, man, you gotta make it work!  
Fiona: Aren't your kids enough to keep you together? Aren't they reason enough?  
(3 second pause)  
Ellie (speaking clearly): Sorry for waking you, everybody. (quietly, to Manny) We'll discuss this tomorrow. Goodnight.

(Everyone uneasily settles down for the night. When the coast is clear; Buzz Lightyear squeezes through the posts that make the crib's wall. He drops to the frozen ground with a sound no bigger than a click. Waving over the rest of the toy team; they manage to sneak past Dragon and escape into a small cave almost hidden by Dragon's tail)  
Jessie: What a crew!  
Hamm: Buzz, I thought you said we'd be donated. Again.  
Buzz: We were donated. To those freaky green things.  
Woody: Donated. Again. You know, it's just a wicked, nasty circle.  
Slinky: So then what is this place?  
Buzz: I don't know.  
(2 second pause)  
Jessie: That's just great.  
Slinky: So what now?  
Woody: It's a circle, Slink. They don't end. They don't change. They just keep going and going and going. Like...like...  
Jessie: The Energizer Bunny?

Buzz: Who's that? A trespasser of my lady's grounds? Do I need to take out his batteries?

Jessie (smiling): No.

Woody (muttering): I'm just surprised you managed to take a landing in her field.  
Hamm: Eww!  
Buzz: You're sick.

Woody: Now just calm down. I am on your side. I'm in the same position you are.  
Jessie: What?!  
Woody (hastily): Not position, per se, I'm...I'm...I've got your back.  
Jessie: I don't think so!  
Woody: No, no, I mean - I want the same things.

Buzz (quietly): You're disgusting.

(Woody throws his hands up in the air in defeat and begins to pace)  
Slinky: What he's trying to say is, he just wants to get out of this place.

Hamm (making LGMs giggle): Hmph! Sounds like he wanted "in" to me.  
Woody: You're all misunderstanding me on purpose.  
(Seeing Dragon's tail swivel toward them; the toys scramble to hide behind the large rocks inside the cave. Seconds later, peering out timidly; they see the lowest half of Dragon traipsing noisily past the cave's mouth. The toys crouch in terror as the smaller of the crew follows Dragon...)  
Fiona (stopping right in front of cave): Shrek?  
(Shrek goes back to her)  
Fiona (lifting Fargle out of the crib and looking in his empty spot): Have you seen the kids' toys?  
Shrek: No. But seriously, what would they do? Get up and run away? I'm sure someone else has them; now let's go. (guides Fiona away to the crowd)  
Woody (catching Buzz's thoughtful stare at Jessie): Oh, come on, Buzz; surely we can't go after them!  
Hamm: For once I agree with Woody. If those brats at Sunnyside didn't teach you anything; fine, Buzz, you go right on ahead. We'll just get another Buzz in the toy aisle.

Jessie: Oh yeah? Well I'm with Buzz on this one; so you just try to get another Jessie.  
Woody: What?

Jessie: I'm rare! They discontinued me after I was made. So you go ahead. Get another Buzz. But just remember, Woody; you've lost half your value.

Hamm: Value? We're stuck in the freaking Ice Age here, lady! The only way we'll ever be valuable is if we get out.

Buzz: Not even.

Mrs. Potato Head: What's that supposed to mean, wise guy?

Buzz: Oh, come on, gang! We're getting old! Best case scenario - we get out of this mess, return to Bonnie's, and she's either all grown up or, she's replaced us. Worst case scenario - we're stuck here and both time and this bad weather corrode us.  
Mr. Potato Head: No - best case scenario. We get out, return to Bonnie and everything is like it was before.  
Buzz: That's not a scenario. That's your wish. Every rookie's mistake. (sidles against wall closest to the direction in which Dragon had led her own crew; and peers discreetly around the edge) Drat.  
Jessie: Drat? I hate drat. What's drat?  
Buzz: They're gone. We missed our chance.

Woody: Maybe that's for the best, Buzz. How would it have gone had we followed them, asking for a ride? I dare any one of you to give me a best scenario.

Hamm: Okay, best scenario - the freaky green kids keep us.  
Woody: That's the worst case scenario. I should know.  
Rex: Well, I'm going to explore. (turns back to cave entrance) If there's one thing I know how to do, it's play dead; which has kept me safe for a long time and - (stops as the eyes of all his friends shift slightly behind him. Rex turns as the shadow swallows up the entire cave. He looks to see a pale green Lesothosaurus Dinosaur peering into the cave. She kidnaps Rex, mistaking him for her offspring; and leaves...)  
Hamm: I guess in a world of no toys, we can't blame her.

Buzz: Gentlemen, keep sharp. We're going to need all eyes. And Jess...stay here.  
Jessie: What?

Buzz: Stay here, in the cave. We'll be back.  
(2 second pause as Jessie looks at the others)  
Jessie: You better.  
(Buzz holds her hand for one fleeting moment before following the others into the storm. "Snowballed" by AC/DC" plays as the scene slowly fades to black)**  
* * ***


	2. Chapter 2

**PART 2 2.26.12 - 05.14.12 **  
*** * ***

(The sun has started rising; coloring the sky pink, gold and red as it ascends the mountain's crest. From in her place; Ellie looks to her left. She sees Manny with the others, listening to Donkey talk. With a grim look of dread; Ellie makes her way to Dragon. She lifts Tyroko from her security and sets her on the snowy ground; where Tyroko begins learning how to walk...)  
Manny: Oh. You're up.  
Ellie: Yeah. It's...tomorrow...  
Manny: Yeah. I know.  
Ellie: So...do you want to talk now?  
Manny: Maybe not here.  
(Ellie looks around at the others; who are stretching after their long trip)  
Manny: Come on. (leads her out of hearing range)  
(Once in a private enough area, Ellie tells her side of the story)  
Ellie: Manny, when I first met you I thought you were just having a bad day. But every day since it's been the same. Throw people around, yell at them, make them feel in-significant...  
Manny: I'm a big guy, Ellie. A lot of things are insignificant.  
Ellie: I'm not talking about size; I'm talking about Sid. You even have that effect on me.  
Manny: Well, maybe that's because you grew up thinking you were a possum.  
Ellie: Look, all I'm sayin' is, you're... (falters as Manny scrutinizes her) I mean, you're just...  
Manny: What? What am I?  
Ellie: Rude.  
Manny: Oh. (3 second silence)  
Ellie: You're not mad?  
Manny: Ellie, look around. We're in a world of hate and predator. You go soft - you die.  
Ellie: Manny, we have kids to protect. We can't act with hate toward them.  
Manny: Protection seems to border on hate. If you give them what they want and not what they need; you aren't being a good parent.  
Ellie: I...I...  
Manny: You can reward them with what they want. But you're a parent first. You're supposed to be their safe place; and that's what parents are for. You can't protect them by being a parent second.  
Ellie: I know that! But why must you go so tough on them even if nothing is wrong?  
Manny (mutter): Nothing is right.  
Ellie: What?  
Manny: Never mind. (walks back to group; Ellie follows)  
(Scene fades into next; in which Diego is trotting freely through the tall grass. His attention is diverted from his morning run when a horse-pulled carriage squeaks to a stop nearby. Snow White gets out and scans the area; oblivious to the hidden Diego. From inside the carriage; the dimly lit silhouettes of Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, and Artie are seen. Snow White walks in front of the carriage and looks first right, then left. At that moment, Diego stalks out the grass...)  
Cinderella (screaming, pointing; and awakening Sleeping Beauty): Look out!  
(Snow White turns so suddenly that she scares the one horse drawing the carriage. He rears up and comes down; his left hoof coming down only hairs away from Diego. Diego is startled and attacks the horse...)  
Sleeping Beauty (as Snow White grabs Diego and pulls): Are you insane? Get in, now!  
Snow White (to Diego): This is...not food!  
Diego (scaring Snow White): Not to humans.  
(Snow White releases him and steps back; both hands in the air. Cinderella opens the passenger door, snatches Snow White, and yanks her into the driver's side before slamming the door...)  
Sleeping Beauty (after yawning): I've had horse before.  
Snow White/Cinderella: Eww!  
Cinderella: Snow, you look like you've seen a ghost.  
Snow White: Something...spoke to me.  
(Before anyone can say anything more; Dragon flies above them. Seeing her; Diego gives up on the horse and takes two steps after the fleeing flying figure. He roars once and then spots her six dronkeys, flying after her. He is so preoccupied with the view that he is unaware of Cinderella sneaking up right behind him. She drops him quickly by slamming a cookie sheet against his head. She hurries back to the carriage and the horse, stunned but uninjured, quickly pulls the carriage and leads the trio to safety...)  
Cinderella: What on earth was that?  
Snow White: A sabre. You've got to remember, we're in the Ice Age now. Don't be surprised if we encounter dinosaurs.  
Sleeping Beauty: Oh, we'll be surprised. We'll just try not to lock up.  
Cinderella (as she and Snow White giggle): No kidding.  
(With no transition, scene fades into next; in which Diego comes to. He pulls himself to a sitting position and looks around. He retraces his own steps; which eventually leads him to Dragon, Shrek, Fiona, Donkey, Puss In Boots; Crash, Sid, Peaches, Tyroko, Ellie and Manny...)  
Diego (with smile as he approaches): Hey!  
(Shrek and Fiona look around, wondering who could be talking. Donkey, whose ears are tilted down as he hides behind Shrek in fear; is looking right at Diego, very well aware of who is speaking. Puss In Boots, safely sitting on Shrek's shoulder, is also aware; as are Ellie, Manny, Crash and Peaches...)  
Manny (uncertainly): Hi.  
Diego (looking down): Hey El, what's your kid's name? You go with Tyroko?  
Ellie (hopeful): You remember?  
Diego: Yep. Hit the road, Jack - my old bean's workin' again.  
Sid: What?  
Diego: It's...more up the alley for those who weren't disowned.  
(2 second pause)  
Ellie: Yep. He's back.  
Sid: Why would I need my parents to get a joke?  
Manny: You ever hear the story of Jack and the magic beans?  
Sid: No.  
Manny: Yeah, well, that's why.  
Shrek (to Diego): You go with this crowd?  
Diego: Sure do. (pauses and rethinks) Do you?  
Fiona: Not quite. We're from your future.  
(Diego laughs shortly and sarcastically; but sobers when he sees the stern, completely serious expressions of everyone else...)  
Diego: You serious?  
Fiona: Yes. I know it sounds hard to believe; but...  
Shrek: Time machine.  
Diego (knowingly): Oh.  
Crash: You know?  
Diego: Time travel has been proven to me. I saw you appear out of nowhere.  
Fiona: Then why did you doubt me?  
Diego: It's...it's just unnatural. I was hoping my amnesia was getting to me.  
Manny: Come on, little princess; give the guy a break. He just remembered his entire life a few minutes ago.  
Fiona: His whole life?  
Diego: Yeah.  
Fiona (disbelievingly): A few moments ago.  
Diego/Manny: Yeah.  
Fiona: Okay.  
Diego: "Okay". What's "okay"?  
Fiona: Oh...nothing. It's just...unnatural.  
(At that moment, Snow White's carriage pulls up and slides across some thick, slick ice. Shrek sidesteps it and grabs the back end with just one hand, as though it were a toy. The carriage is strained, stopped from hitting the horse; who is able to regain control of his legs. Snow White, Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella get out...)  
Cinderella (approaching Shrek): Thanks. That was a bit nerve-wracking.  
(Snow White is seen in the blurred background running into Fiona's arms for a quick embrace; which lasts only one second. "Camera" then pans back to carriage; at which point Artie hoists himself to a sitting position and sleepily looks out the window. Seeing Fiona staring at him; he gets out of the carriage and hesitantly approaches his cousin...)  
Artie: Whoa. It's been...  
Fiona: Five years?  
Artie (looking to his right and spotting Lillian): Oh wow. Is that Aunt Lilly?  
Lillian (looking): Arthur! (approaches) What a pleasant surprise.  
Snow White (from behind Artie): You're his aunt?  
Lillian (fondly): Yes. Have you two met?  
Snow White (as her waist-long hair falls over her shoulders): Yeah. And I must say, he's quite indescribable.  
Lillian: Excuse me...?  
(Snow White hooks arms with Artie, who smiles)  
Lillian: Oh! Oh, I see. Oh, that is wonderful! You look great together. (respectively leaves them alone together; Artie and Snow White kiss once quickly before, hand in hand, joining the group...)  
Fiona: You're together?  
Artie: Two years now.  
Fiona: Oh, congratulations!  
Snow White: Um...Fiona?  
(Fiona turns. Snow White cocks one eyebrow; but when Fiona doesn't understand the silent message; Snow White tilts her head toward Fergus, Farkle and Felicia. Fiona looks at them, then back; and then her entire expression gradually becomes that of understanding. 4 second pause. With no transition; scene shifts to focus on Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty...)  
Cinderella: I don't much care for this world. All animals, no boys. Sleeping Beauty: I don't much care for it either. Where are the beds? (yawns)  
Cinderella (nudging her): Did I not just say that?  
(Sleeping Beauty giggles)  
(Shrek is rubbing two sticks together, trying to make a fire. After 5 seconds of Dragon looking at him, unimpressed; she whacks the sticks from him by using her tail. She ignores his glare and spits a single ball of abrupt fire onto the sticks; which alight immediately and a steady fire dances on the sticks...)  
Shrek: Yeah, that works.  
Donkey: Why sizzle when you can burn? (nuzzles Dragon) Thanks, hot stuff.  
(Counter clockwise; Fiona, Shrek, Puss In Boots, Donkey, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White and Artie huddle closest to the fire; making the innermost circle. The outermost circle is clockwise made by Manny, Ellie, and Dragon. Peaches sits in Shrek's lap; while Puss In Boots sits on Shrek's right shoulder. Fiona holds Tyroko in her lap and Crash sits on her left shoulder. Sleeping Beauty holds Felicia; Cinderella holds Fergus; and Artie holds Farkle. Diego sits furthest from the fire; ten feet away from Sid...)  
Artie: So. Fiona. How long have you been here?  
Fiona (thinking): Two days.  
Artie (flatly): Oh. That's not a long time at all.  
Fiona: It is with no beds and no blankets.  
Snow White (getting up hastily): Oh yes, that reminds me... (heads toward carriage)  
Artie: Why didn't you visit, or invite me over to the castle?  
Fiona: It's not like I was at the castle. Artie: You weren't?  
Fiona: If I were; believe me, I'd have invited you.  
(Artie looks accusingly at Lillian. Fiona, then everyone else; follows his gaze. Lillian shifts her weight...)  
Lillian: Pardon me; just going to...go check on Snow White. (heads toward carriage)  
Fiona: I just can't believe how much everything has changed since I'd last seen you.  
Artie: You wouldn't have noticed if you had been there.  
Sleeping Beauty: True enough.  
Fiona: You never came to the swamp. And yet...the only thing that's changed is your end.  
Cinderella: Not true. You had your kids. They had a few birthdays.  
Fiona: Yeah, yes - but Snow White's pregnant and committed to my cousin.  
Cinderella: She's pregnant?!  
(A stunned Cinderella can only gawk in shock. Beside her, Sleeping Beauty falls limply backward off the log bench on which she'd been sitting. A cloud of powder envelopes her. Before Felicia can succeed at her attempt of an escape; Ellie picks her up using her trunk...)  
Fiona: She...hadn't told you, huh?  
Cinderella (angry): No, she hadn't.  
Fiona: I am...so so sorry.  
(Snow White runs up from behind and hoists Sleeping Beauty into a sitting position; but sighs in relief when she hears a snore. She looks up with a relieved smile; which fades when she sees Cinderella glaring at her; and everyone else staring in either shock or wonder...)  
Snow White: What?  
Cinderella: Y-you're having KIDS?!  
(Snow White lets Sleeping Beauty drop from her arms and back into the snow. She hastily stands at the same time Cinderella stands...)  
Cinderella: Why didn't you say something?  
Snow White (getting very close to Cinderella): Because I...wasn't...ready.  
Cinderella (turning her glare to Artie): You're dead meat, Penndragon.  
Fiona (harshly): Sit down.  
(Cinderella sits immediately and haughtily crosses her arms; glaring up at Snow White, who stands to her right. At that moment, Lillian steers the carriage-pulled horse right up to camp. She, Fiona, and Shrek each take a bundle of sleeping bags and everyone silently helps spread them out in a circular array around the fire. The tension is thick. Finally, Cinderella breaks the ice...)  
Cinderella (muttering): After all we've done. Accept him into the group - let him into Fiona's castle - let him use her cutlery - and he defiles one of us.  
Snow White: Whoa, he did not defile me!  
Cinderella: Are you pregnant?  
Snow White: Yes.  
Cinderella: He defiled you. (lifts Sleeping Beauty up so Fiona can slide a sleeping bag underneath)  
Artie: "Defile" would imply that she was against it.  
Cinderella: Shut up, schoolboy!  
Fiona: Hey! That's my cousin you're talking to!  
Snow White (sitting gracefully on a sleeping bag): Everybody just shut up and sleep.  
Fiona: Yeah. Eyes closed, ears open.  
(Artie and Snow White share a sleeping bag. Shrek and Fiona lay side by side. Lillan, Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella each have their own. The six dronkeys as well as Fergus, Farkle, Felicia; Peaches and Tyroko are left in the security of Dragon's watchful eyes. Donkey and Puss In Boots each snuggle up in their own sleeping bags to raise their body temperatures. Used to the cold; Manny, Ellie, Diego and Sid lay down in their places. For an awkward five seconds, all is quiet and still. Then Cinderella sits up and looks around; unable to shake the feeling that she's being watched. Everyone at camp has their eyes closed. Cinderella surveys her surroundings beyond base. She focuses on what appears to be a sulking silhouette slinking low to the ground. "Camera" shows a closeup of Cinderella's eyes; and reflected in them is a glowing pair of fluorescent blue eyes. When Cinderella blinks; the reflection of those eyes within hers are gone. 2 second pause before scene, with no transition, becomes next; in which Woody, Buzz, Hamm, Slink, and Mr. Potato Head are sidling along the wall of a five-inch high ledge. Directly above them on the higher elevation is the mother Lesothosaurus with her kidnappee, Rex. Used to listening to and for footsteps; they are able to tell it is safe to speak when they hear her footsteps fade into nothingness...)  
Woody: Okay. Okay, she's not that much bigger than we are. We can do this.  
Hamm: We can, but we shouldn't.  
Mr. Potato Head: I agree. Let's get outta this freaky kid's place.  
Woody: You don't want to help him?  
Mr. Potato Head: He can take care of himself!  
Buzz (sarcastically): Sure he can. He's done great so far.  
Mr. Potato Head: Look, all I'm sayin' is, we can get a new Buzz - a new Slink - a new Hamm. We're all replaceable. And like you said, Buzz, we're getting old. Is it really worth it to die now?  
Woody (hands on hips): Boy, some team you guys make. Fine. I'll do it myself. (turns, jumps, and hoists himself onto the ledge; and disappears following the Lesothosaurus. Buzz quickly follows; then Slink, who helps up Hamm - and Mr. Potato Head, after giving in and trying to jump up to grab the ledge like Woody had, but continues to fail. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which the toy team have gotten themselves up onto a tree branch and are clinging onto the tree branch for dear life as they look below them at Rex and his kidnapper...)  
Buzz (quietly): Even I'll admit, this is a bit over the top, Woody.  
Woody: Shh!  
Buzz (quietly): I'm sayin'...  
Hamm (looking down): Hey. Look at that.  
(Everyone looks. The Lesothosaurus is trying to feed Rex...)  
Woody: Oh, for Pete's sake. This is ridiculous. (drops from the tree, much to his friends' horror)  
(Woody acts casual as he passes the Lesothosaurus. Then he turns around to face her...)  
Hamm: Look at him. He's gonna get himself killed.  
Buzz: Oh, please. Everyone knows these types of dinosaurs are herbivores.  
Slink: What?  
Buzz: Plant eaters.  
Mr. Potato Head: It's not like we have any meat if she wasn't. I'm gettin' off this thing.  
(Meanwhile, below...)  
Woody: Hey. Stop wastin' your time. He's not real.  
(The Lesothosaurus looks at him)  
Woody: That's right. You heard me! He can't eat anything 'cuz he's a toy. Plastic. He's a kid's plaything.  
Rex: Gee, thanks, I was beginning to feel self-conscious.  
Woody: I was hoping you wouldn't take something true so personally.  
Lesothosaurus: He's not my kid?  
Woody: You couldn't tell? Kind of a bad mistake for a parent, don't you think?  
(Lesothosaurus turns and leaves)  
Woody: Well. That was easy.  
Buzz: Well, you made it hard.  
(Woody looks up the tree to see his friends climbing down one-by-one)  
Rex: How could she mistake me for her kid?  
Woody: How could she mistake anyone for her kid? She's careless!  
Hamm (joining): Ah, carelessness. The biggest 'oops' in any parent.  
Woody: Hey, it's too easy for us to judge. We don't have the power to start families; it's...it's just not in us.  
Mr. Potato Head (joining): Ah, there's the wordsmith of our group. Where was he all this time?  
Woody: That one was unintentional. Hamm (looking at Mr. Potato Head): Ah, there he is.  
Buzz (joining): Okay, troops, we have women to return to. Are you ready?  
Hamm (as everyone else leaves): And then there were two. (follows)

(Afternoon...)  
(Diego, awake from earlier, restlessly lifts his head and, barely looking to his right, sees a pair of fluorescent blue eyes in the blackness of the surrounding foliage. He continues watching to see a pair of pastel green eyes meet with the blue eyes. Diego hoists himself immediately into a defensive stance and, turning to face them, growls; shooting the sleeping Dragon into consciousness. Diego's growl awakens his friends and also provokes their watchers. But, as the blue eyes defensively move forward; a familiar voice speaks up...)  
Voice: No, hey, you don't attack my people.  
(Without dropping his guard; Diego flashes a quick look to his left at the group. All are present, except Puss In Boots; whose bare spot is revealed as Dragon awakens and shifts her position. As Dragon neutrally looks down at Diego; he looks back at the shrubs just in time to see Puss In Boots - the green-eyed being - emerge with Kitty Softpaws - the blue-eyed being...)  
Kitty: You're hangin' with him? If I can scare him; your safety is not guaranteed.  
Puss In Boots (gesturing): Relax...they're all with us. Kitty (looking around, exhaling): I guess it's better than nothing. Snow White (from behind): You mean this little thing?  
(Diego, Dragon, Kitty and Puss In Boots look at her...)  
Snow White (to Cinderella): You can't be serious. This little kitten scared you? (picks Kitty up)  
Cinderella: I only saw her eyes! I couldn't see the rest of it.  
(Kitty shoots a cocky glance at Puss In Boots; who looks away in unhappy acknowledgement)  
Snow White (hysterical): She can't even hurt you, wimp! Look! (holds out paw for display) Cinderella: Just...put it down!  
(Snow White sets Kitty down on the grass with a roll of her eyes)  
Puss In Boots (to Kitty, as Snow White and Cinderella leave): I've got to say, I did not expect to see you again. Let alone in the past.  
Kitty: Maybe you weren't looking for me.  
Puss In Boots: I do not understand.  
Kitty: I'm sayin', I was more of a neighbor than you think. And when I heard of your plans to use a time machine; I knew I had to come along.  
Puss In Boots: You were with us all this time?  
Kitty: Yes. (3 second pause) Don't tell me you're mad!  
Puss In Boots: I'm not. I'm...I'm...  
Sid: Violated?  
(Puss In Boots and Kitty look up)  
Kitty: What?  
Sid: Well, that's how he should feel. That is a huge invasion of privacy.  
(Diego, passing by, notices Puss In Boots and Kitty looking up. He looks up and begins to look annoyed)  
Diego: Says the eavesdropping sloth hanging upside down in a poisonous fruit tree.  
Sid (dropping from the tree): Ahh! Ahh! (disappears, heading for the creek)  
Manny (passing by, looks up): What're you talking about? It's a common apple tree.  
Diego (smiling): I know. (Manny smiles and keeps walking. Diego follows; then Peaches, then Snow White and to her left is Artie. They hold hands. Crash hangs from Snow White's right arm)  
Snow White (looking up at the tree): I hardly think that's funny. (keeps walking)  
(Ellie, holding Tyroko is next in line; followed by Shrek, who is pushing two of the triplets, Farkle and Felicia, in their carriage; and followed by Fiona and Donkey. Then Sleeping Beauty, who has Cinderella to her back right. Kitty and Puss In Boots fall in step behind Cinderella; with Dragon bringing up the rear of the line. The six Dronkeys can be seen flying above them; playing air games as they follow the ring leader. "Camera" pans to Dragon's tail; which is looped around the carriage; which is being pulled backward. The horse that led the carriage once is now behind it; his muzzle tied to the reins, which are attached to the carriage's front so he can walk straight. Sitting inside is Lillian, holding Fergus)  
Snow White: This feels wrong.  
Artie: I know. Feels like we're going off to war or something.  
Snow White: No, what I meant was - I think this is it.  
Artie (looking just in time to see her hands go to her stomach, and he clues in): Oh! That! (calls ahead) Stop!  
(Line stops moving. Artie guides Snow White to the end of the line and helps her into the carriage; to Lillian's right. Fiona relieves Lillian of Fergus to take him back to her place in line. Artie gets inside the carriage and, with one assistant on either side, Snow White begins the breathing exercises. As soon as Artie closes his carriage door, the line continues to move)  
Artie: It's okay. Keep breathing.  
Snow White: Yeah, thanks; I'd have forgotten.  
(In another area of the line...)  
Fiona: You think she's okay?  
Shrek: Yeah. Look, you popped out three; I'm sure she can handle one.  
(Fiona looks at him)  
(At the head of the line...)  
Diego: Maybe it's best if I lead.  
Manny (beginning to look doubtful): Uhh...I don't think so, pal.  
Diego: Why not?  
Manny: Uh, hello, you went back to Lenny.  
Diego: Look, if I wanted to set you up - Manny: Again?  
Diego: If I wanted to set you up again, I'd have to go west. We're going north. In any case, the only reason I think I should lead is because when I was out of it; I found a great cave.  
Manny: A cave with an ambush waiting for us?  
Peaches: Dad, while I understand why you're taking caution; why would any animal attack you if we have Dragon?  
(3 second pause)  
Manny (to Diego): Fine.  
(Diego leads the way. Scene fades into next; in which Diego finds the cave. The grass is tall and healthy; and the mossy limbs of an ancient tree stretch across the mouth of the cave. At the right side of the cave, another opening provides a clear look at the ocean beyond the cave. A waterfall cascades over either side of the opening; leaving the middlemost of the mouth a dry entrance. Stone steps protruding from the sandy bottom of the ocean lead right into the cave. On the left side of the cave; a different set of stone stairs lead down into catacomb tunnels; in which bricks of gold, jewels and crystals are embedded firmly into the walls)  
Ellie: Wow.  
Kitty: That's an understatement. Diego: No statement is quite big enough. (turns) Shrek, Fiona...This is where your little prince planned to come so he could avoid the destruction of his home.  
Fiona: What?  
Diego: Look down there.  
(Everyone looks down at the catacombs)  
Diego: You see how those walls right there are blue?  
Shrek: What about it?  
Diego: This Charming guy built two time machines. One of them was handheld; no bigger than a snowball. He deployed it in that tunnel and turned it on. By walking down that blue tunnel; you...Shrek...and anyone from that timeline will be automatically rejected from this one and into that one.  
Sid: He's a freakin' genius!  
Diego: He built this place. He constructed everything you see with his bare hands. Those jewels on his wall came from his timeline. His bedroom. His castle. He stole them from his mother's safe after she died and brought them here. But he and Rapunzel had a fight just before he left; and he came here without her. The grief was so immense, he had to go back. But...when he returned to his timeline to bring the both of them here; the destruction of his homeland...killed him.  
Fiona: How do you know all this?  
Diego: Rapunzel told me.  
(2 second pause)  
Rapunzel: Hello, Fiona.  
(Fiona turns around in shock)  
Rapunzel: Fiona's friends, Fiona's freaks...Diego.  
(Manny purposely bumps into Diego and begins cornering him...)  
Diego: Okay, I know this looks bad.  
Manny: Oh, gee, you think?  
Artie (rushing into the cave): I'm a father!  
(5 second silence; during which Rapunzel slowly turns to face Artie)  
Artie: What's she doing here?  
Rapunzel: Actually, I - Artie: You know what, I don't really care. I'-I'm...I have to go! (runs back out)  
(Just then Sid surfaces in the ocean right near the stone steps. He manages to grab and hold onto the stair; and Peaches, with a sigh, pulls him up)  
Sid: Oh, thanks. (looks around) Where are we?  
Peaches: Up here. (leads Sid inside cave) Uh, you were right near that waterfall. Why do you feel warm?  
Sid: Look east. (smiles as Peaches looks east)  
Peaches: Oh! I see.  
Donkey: See what?  
Peaches: See that volcano?  
Donkey: Yeah...  
Peaches: It's far enough away where we aren't affected negatively; but we're also sitting on lava tubes, which are keeping the water warm.  
(An amused Shrek reaches out and puts his hand under the waterfall. The sudden change in pressure causes it to spray him and everyone close enough to him; and Shrek pulls his hand away quickly; looking at the waterfall in wonder)  
Shrek: The waterfall is still cold...  
Peaches: Of course. There are no lava tubes way up there. Down there, however, we would be only 3,500 kilometres away from a temperature of plus 7000; which is a distance minor enough to be affected.  
Rapunzel (crossing arms): And I suppose you know how many feet are in a mile?  
Peaches (looking at her blankly): 5,280.  
(Rapunzel rolls eyes in sheer annoyance)  
Peaches: Did you know that?  
Rapunzel (glaring): Of course I didn't! I'm not a freak!  
Peaches: You think that's bad; I'm only two years old. Just wait 'til I'm sixty.  
(Everyone laughs as Rapunzel gapes)  
Peaches: Oh! Oops. Am I stealing your thunder? Were you supposed to be the funny one?  
Rapunzel: Uhh...uhh...  
Peaches: Hmph. I guess someone has to do it.  
(Everyone laughs as Rapunzel glares)  
Peaches: Gee, maybe try to look unhappy.  
Rapunzel: (sigh) Have fun in your sixty years, smartass.  
Peaches: Will do, dumbass.  
(Rapunzel growls and stomps out of the cave)  
Manny (impressed): Isn't she perfect?  
Peaches: No, Dad. Life is. All life forms are far from. Donkey: So modest.  
Peaches (facing Donkey): For example your nature is of no consolation to your species.  
(Everyone stares in shock. Peaches simply smiles at him, but is completely serious by the time she turns away from him. She leaps through the waterfall and into the ocean; making the waterfall spray Donkey right in the chest. Puss In Boots, sitting right beside Donkey, shields himself from getting wet also; then looks up at Donkey...)  
Puss In Boots: She kind of has a point there.  
(Donkey makes a face at him. At that moment, Artie walks back into the cave; holding a baby swaddled in a pink blanket...)  
Artie: Fiona! Come say hi to your new second cousin. Rosie.  
(Fiona, as well as Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella, gather around to "greet" the baby)  
Fiona: Rosie.  
(2 second pause before scene fades into next; in which it is nighttime and everyone is asleep in Diego's prized cave. Everyone, that is, except Lillian; who sits up and looks to her right at the glowing blue wall. She gets up and begins to walk down the stairwell. As she's standing in the glow, getting ready to jump through the time portal; Fiona's voice stops her)  
Fiona: Mom? What're you doing?  
Lillian (turning to face Fiona): I-I have to do this, Fiona. I miss your father.  
Fiona: I miss him too. But he would want you to move on. It's time.  
Lillian: Fiona, time is finally a friend! We can get him back. We can have everything the way it was; don't you get it?  
Fiona: Of course I get it. But time is only a friend now because of Charming. Lillian: I don't care. Fiona: If you bring him back, you'll just have to lose him again another time. Do you want him to suffer through death again?  
Lillian (grabbing big brown duffle bag): No, Fiona. I want him to experience life again. Fiona: Well...I understand that...  
(3 second pause)  
Lillian: Come with me.  
Fiona: Wh-  
Lillian: I know it sounds crazy...But I could really use the extra help! Besides, then he can see us both at once.  
(3 second pause)  
(Fiona nods. They grasp hands and walk through the shimmering portal. They become pure white silhouettes amidst the hazy blue screen; and then with a buzz and a crackle, the glow fades; leaving only the time portal in its place. Meanwhile, Shrek rolls over in his place and opens his eyes while smiling; but his expression quickly turns to shock when he realizes Fiona's place is empty. He sits up, rubbing at his head; and looks around. Scene fades into next; in which Fiona and Lillian are ejected into Far Far Away; back into their own timeline. It's an easy transportation and neither are harmed; the only side effect being a tickling feeling as the white glow dissipates from their bodies)  
Fiona: Charming sure knew what he was doing.  
Lillian: Yes. If only he had been on our side.  
Prince Charming: Why would I in any universe do that?  
(Fiona and Lillian turn around)  
Fiona: You're alive?  
Prince Charming: Of course! Where else would I be?  
Fiona: You died!  
Prince Charming (mounting horse): Then explain to me why I'm here. (2 second silence)  
Fiona: Oh no.  
Lillian: What?  
Fiona: Charming didn't build the time machines. Rapunzel did. She left him here.  
Prince Charming: Who's Rapunzel?  
Lillian: She's your girlfriend!  
Prince Charming: Don't be silly. I'm much too good-looking to be tied down.  
Fiona: Oh, good; does this mean you'll stop pestering me simply because we'd unite the kingdoms?  
Prince Charming: Yes, we would unite the kingdoms. But I have no interest in marrying an ogre. Especially one whose standards are so low as to marry Shrek.  
Fiona: I'm just surprised you meet the standards for being called 'Prince' Charming when your actions depict you as little more than a common player. I mean, don't you have responsibilities as a prince?  
Prince Charming: No. Of course not. Mother's servants do it all.  
Fiona: So...umm...how is the old bird, anyway? Still running the coop?  
Prince Charming: Naturally. Maybe we'll talk another time; I have to get home. (rides away)  
Fiona: "Talk another time"? Does he remember me?  
Lillian: I think he does, dear. And more importantly, I think this is what happened. Since Prince Charming is now acting like a "common player", he never tried to get your attention. He never tried to steal you away from Shrek. And he never got his mother to help him out.  
Fiona (cluing in): Puss In Boots never met Dad.  
Lillian: Your father never met me.  
(They look at each other)  
Fiona: Boy. I've got to admit it - I wish you'd just stuck to the Ice Age.  
Lillian: Me too. (4 second pause as Lillian looks around; then she points) There he is! (calls out to him) Harold! Harold!  
(King Harold looks around and sees her waving)  
Fiona (watching her): Mom, you just said he never met you.  
Lillian: In that case, you might want to stay here. (approaches Harold; 5 seconds of their unheard conversation pass before Lillian turns and gestures to Fiona; who decides to wave. Lillian proceeds to wave her over; so Fiona approaches)  
Harold: Um, thanks for the...generous offer - but I really have things to do. A king almost never leaves his castle.  
Lillian: You're king? But...I was the queen; we were married! It's not like I stepped down; why is this happening?  
Harold: If there's one thing I know, it's my wife. Her name is not Lillian.  
Lillian: So then who is she?  
Harold: Her name is Myriad Angel. (looks up expectantly and points) Here she is now.  
(Fiona and Lillian both look up to see a winged silhouette hovering above them. As the winged woman flies down and lands; Fiona and Lillian are shocked to see it is the Fairy Godmother...)  
Fiona (skeptically): Myriad Angel?  
Fairy Godmother: Yes. I suppose Harold's told you a bit about me.  
Fiona: Your name is not Myriad. You're just the winged witch of this town.  
(Fairy Godmother points her wand at Fiona and she is enveloped in a sparkly pink dust; when it recedes, Fiona is left in her human form)  
Fairy Godmother: Maybe in your eyes; but I am not the witch who cast your spell upon you. You're welcome.  
Fiona: What's your problem? Change me back. Fairy Godmother: Why? Does your husband not approve of the real you?  
Fiona: That's not what I meant!  
Fairy Godmother: Fine. Suffer through the stares and evil treatments being an ogre will provide you. I care not - you mean very little to my son. (changes Fiona back to ogre form; then turns to Harold) Come; we need to think of a present good enough for Charming.  
Harold: Ah, yes. Right. His birthday.  
Fairy Godmother: Don't tell me you forgot!  
Harold: Of course not. But, being king doesn't exactly come by an easy schedule.  
Fairy Godmother: Stop with your complaining. I'm wife, mother, queen and godmother to every single person in this vindictive little village. Harold: Yes dear. (follows her as she flies low to the ground toward the kingdom)  
Fiona: Mom! This is pointless! Lillian: No it isn't. Fiona: Yes, it is.  
Lillian: No, I really think - Fiona: You aren't thinking at all! It won't be the same; no matter how much you want to believe it! He's dead.  
Lillian: Well, he doesn't have to be.  
Fiona: It isn't your decision! Time travelling? We shouldn't be capable of changing everything if it's meant to happen! It's not up to us.  
Lillian: Yes it is. We were given the power; I suggest we use it. Fiona: Fine. So what do you "suggest" we do first? Kidnap him from the Fairy God-mother? Or drag him back in time to the Ice Age and force him into a marriage he doesn't remember?  
(Lillian looks slowly at the ground)  
Fiona: It'll never work. And I'm not going to waste time trying to force it. I have a niece, and a cousin, friends, and a husband to get back to.  
Lillian: But...my husband...  
Fiona: He was your husband in a different life, Mom. And he's either dead in the Ice Age, or a stranger to you here. And at least in the Ice Age you don't need to watch him be with his new wife!  
(3 second silence)  
Fiona: This is too weird for me. I don't know why I came!  
Lillian: Okay. Okay, let's go back. You're right, it's...it won't work. (passes Fiona)  
Fiona (following): I'm sorry.  
Lillian: No, no, it's...the Fairy Godmother; who was I kidding? She has...spells, and magic. I can't compete with that. (pauses and looks around; 4 second silence) Umm...Fiona?  
Fiona: Yeah.  
Lillian: How do we go back?  
(Fiona joins her mother's side; and a 2 second silence follows before scene fades into next, in which Diego begins to awaken. First his right ear strains downward; then his eyes flash open. The moon is reflected in his evilly glowing eyes; making them look like fluorescent green yin-yangs. As he looks to his right, his face turns away from the moonlight; taking away the glow from his eyes. He is aware that something is wrong the minute he looks around the cave and notices not only Fiona's absence; but also Shrek's and Lillian's. He gets up and walks soundlessly outside)  
Diego: Shrek?  
(3 second delay)  
Shrek (muffled): Yeah?  
(Diego turns right and goes to the side of the cave; where he finds Shrek leaning against its wall; staring up into the light of an early dawn that is marking its way across the horizon)  
Diego: Where are Fiona and Lillian?  
Shrek: I don't know.  
(Diego sits in the snow to Shrek's right; and looks up at him. Shrek looks down at Diego as he begins to talk...)  
Diego: Maybe she went to check on Rosie.  
Shrek: I looked there. I've looked everywhere.  
Diego: Have you considered the time portal?  
(Shrek seems to freeze; but his eyes flicker to the spot just above Diego's head)  
Diego: I think I forgot to explain the tracking devices. Anyone using the time portal will need to wear one if they want to get home. It's the only way back.  
Shrek: How many tracking devices does it have?  
Diego: Four. Two are armbands; two are lapel pins.  
Shrek: So they're all are still there then?  
Diego: Yeah...  
Shrek: I'll need you to come with me. You're the only one who seems to know anything about this stuff.  
(Without another word; Shrek and Diego head back into the cave. Shrek pins a tracking device onto his shirt and slips an armband tracking device around Diego's front right leg. Diego runs into the portal, emitting a growl as he is surrounded by the white glow that makes him nothing but a blinding silhouette. Shielding his eyes with one hand and snatching the other two tracking devices with his free hand, Shrek follows Diego and is also silhouetted by a white glow. The two are ejected from the Ice Age timeline and transported into Shrek's original timeline. Standing right before them are Fiona and Lillian; who greet them eagerly once the shock of their unusual arrival subsides)  
Fiona: How did you get here?  
Shrek: Why did you come here?  
Lillian: It's my fault. I wanted to bring my husband back into my life.  
Diego: That makes sense.  
Fiona (disbelief): What?  
Lillian (hopeful): You really think so?  
Diego: Absolutely. If I had a wife and she died; I'd have the same wish. It's just un-fortunate we're the only ones who have such an option.  
Lillian (to Fiona, in a singsong voice): I told you so.  
(2 second pause)  
Diego: I think I left a few important things out. (pauses until he has everyone's attention) First off, to get home you'll need to wear one of these. (displays front right leg to show off tracking device) You set the time on the machine and go through the portal, just like you did - we were just lucky someone from your timeline used it last. The tracking devices only have the one button. When you're ready to return to the timeline you'd left from, press that button and the time machine will automatically send you back. You must stay in that general region, otherwise the time machine will lose the connection and you'll be unable to return until you're back on the radar screen, at which time your tracking device will beep twice. Secondly, you can go with a friend, or separately, but should never leave without a tracking device. (Shrek wordlessly holds them out for display and Fiona chooses the lapel pin, Lillian chooses the armband) And lastly; while choosing the timeline you want to travel to; you'll be given a picture on the display screen. It's operated by touch. Always choose the most secretive place. If word gets out that we have these machines, or if people see us magically appear; we'll either be kidnapped or killed. And for God's sake, be discreet with your tracking devices.  
(3 second silence)  
Diego: Clear enough?  
Lillian: Yes.  
Shrek: Oh yeah.  
Fiona: Understood.  
Diego: Good. (1 second pause) I'm going back now. (jumps into a bush. 2 seconds later, a beep is heard coming from within it. Then a 3 second silence follows)  
Shrek: So. Who's coming back with me?  
Fiona: I am. (pauses and looks at Lillian)  
Lillian: It's alright. I'll return to you when I'm ready. (rolls up left sleeve, puts on armband, and rolls down sleeve to hide it)  
Fiona: You be careful.  
Lillian: Of course, dear. (they hug, then Lillian and Shrek hug)  
(Shrek and Fiona disappear behind the bushes; a short-lived silence follows two beeps identical to the one Diego's had made. Alone, Lillian tucks her crown into her duffle bag and takes out of it a gray hooded jacket. She puts it on, zippers it up, and, hoisting her duffle bag over her shoulder; begins the walk in the rain toward the castle. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Shrek and Fiona appear side by side at the exact same time a few paces behind Diego; who turns and looks)  
Diego: That was fast.  
(Shrek smiles at Fiona, who, after briefly looking at Shrek, is smiling down at Diego. A one-second pause follows)  
Diego: So. Your mom decided to stay, huh?  
Fiona: Yes. I hope she isn't doing anything too...disagreeable.  
Diego: She's doing it because she loves him. Isn't trying everything to revive a loved one, better than doing nothing?  
Fiona: This invention, as amazing as it is... (2 second pause) ...I don't know, it's just complete...cow cookies.  
Shrek: Cow cookies?  
Fiona: Yes. This is bigger than all of us! By using these time machines, we are no better than Charming, or Rapunzel. We use it for our own good, our own benefit? Is this really what you want the kids to learn through life - cheat your way through it?  
Shrek: Would you rather let them suffer?  
Fiona: What did they lose? They never knew him. (1 second pause) By going back into the past to alter the future to our liking; we are erasing everything we've accomplished! With one mistake, it could all be much worse, or even over. If Mom makes one tiny tiny mistake we could fade right out of existence!  
Diego (laughingly): I highly doubt that.  
Shrek: I don't.  
(Fiona and Diego look at him questioningly; then Diego looks back at Fiona...)  
Diego: Why are you so steamed? You went back in time to get your family.  
Fiona: They were still alive. I wasn't altering that. Think about this for a minute! Okay? If she brings him back here, what do you think will happen? The town had a funeral for him. You can't explain this to the people without destroying the very rules you gave to us!  
(2 second silence)  
Diego: That's...a good point. Okay, I'll go see if this thing has an Abort button or some-thing. If she returns here, I'll need our strongest people to destroy the machines.

(Lillian is standing on a large boulder nestled right into the sandy bottom of the moat. Her eyes and ears are both alert to sounds. Hearing nothing, Lillian crosses the house using the stepping stones and is able to slip inside through an open window. She walks around in total uncertainty for a few mere seconds. She is quickly diverted to hiding behind a protruding section of the wall. While waiting for a clean shot; Lillian overhears Harold speaking to a new prisoner...)  
Harold: I-I can't even imagine a sentence good enough for what you've done. Snow White: That's how good I am.  
(Lillian, recognizing the voice, peers carefully around the wall)  
Harold: No, it's how bad you are. Just - the things she has accomplished - Snow White (grabbing onto cell door and scaring Harold): She's accomplished nothing! She waves around her stupid stick and grants her own wishes. Even when helping us, it's all about her! And that kid? That stupid kid you inherited? He's not a prince; he's you. He's your Siamese twin. He'll marry someone just like her!  
Harold: Oh, because marrying someone behaviorally identical to one's mother is a promised marriage?  
Snow White: No. His mother is the only woman in his life. He'll find someone just like her but will deny their resemblances! This cycle has got to stop now!  
(A guard is silently approaching Lillian from behind. He draws out his sword and the clink of it brushing against his sheath catches Lillian's attention; as well as the attention of Snow White and Harold. They all look just in time to see the guard's sword spiral through the air toward Lillian. At the exact same time, Lillian is encased in a sheer white glow. When the haze disappears into thin air; all that is left of her narrow escape is the sword, jammed into the wall. Three second pause follows before scene with no transition becomes next; in which Lillian is ejected into the Ice Age. As the blinding white glow fades; everyone is seen awakening. Those already awake - Shrek, Fiona and Diego - are happy to see her)  
Lillian (shakily): That was too close for comfort.  
Fiona: Are you okay?  
Lillian: Yes...But I failed.  
Sid: You aren't a failure by trying.  
Ellie (looking at Sid as she passes him): Oh, Sid, that's so sweet!  
(Sid watches her leave and an expression of joy crosses his face. Diego, already beginning to understand, grabs the sloth around his neck with a growl of war. He jumps out of the cave and onto the steps, disappearing from view. Peaches, looking on in wonder, follows)  
Crash: Is it just me - or is Diego acting a bit funny?  
Eddie (entering cave): Diego always acts funny.  
Crash (spinning around to face his brother): Eddie!  
Eddie: What's everyone doing way over here? Do you know how long it takes a possum to travel that distance alone?  
Crash: A couple of days?  
Eddie: Yes!  
(2 second pause)  
Crash: Okay, you sound mad.  
(Eddie wordlessly crosses arms, glaring. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Diego looks secretively around before dropping Sid to the grass)  
Sid (sitting up): Oww! Try to rush me a bit more next time. Sheez!  
Diego: You...are such...a pathetic waste of fur.  
Sid: What did I do, what did I do?!  
Diego (circling Sid): Fell in love with Manny's girl.  
Sid: Uhh - Diego (circling Sid): I get it. You were going to blame me of the same thing to save your own hide.  
Sid: Okay, well...Y-Yeah, but...  
Diego: I can't wait to tell Manny. It should be good.  
Sid: Oh, no no no no, c'mon; don't do that!  
Diego: Give me a reason.  
Sid: Okay, um...uh...You'll be missing out on my services!  
Diego: Your services? Just what makes you so important? Your social skills?  
Sid: Uhhh...  
Diego: I'd rather see how Manny would go about this...  
Sid: No, no, please, no!  
Diego: Why not? (whispers) Afraid of being stung by a jellyfish? (comes to a stop in front of Sid; eyes bore into his)  
Sid: I taught you to swim for God's sake!  
Diego: Yeah. Now you aren't safe anywhere.  
(Sid trembles)  
Shrek (from cave): Diego!  
Diego (looking at Sid): Count your blessings. You're safe for a few more minutes, but then I'm coming back for you; come hell... (looks first at volcano in background; then down at ocean) ...or high water. (looks back at the shaky sloth before slipping into the water and swimming away)  
(2 second pause)  
Peaches (from behind; scaring Sid): You love my mom?  
Sid: I-I'm very fond of her.  
Peaches: Sid? I taught you about tracking, cardinal directions, ordinal directions...Don't you dare think you can fool me.  
Sid (relenting): Fine! I love her!  
(1 second pause)  
Peaches (plainly): I know. (disappears into foliage; Sid follows)  
Sid: Will you tell Manny?  
Peaches: Maybe. It all depends.  
Sid: On what?!  
Peaches: Several things. Diego could get to him first...I could grow very bored...Or Dad could just clue in. You know how he is.  
Sid: Smart?  
Peaches: Yes. (the pair walks in silence for three seconds) You don't belong in this crowd, Sid. (leaves Sid behind as he slows down)  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Diego pulls himself out of the water and onto the steps that lead to the cave. His fur remains wet as he trots up the steps and approaches the crew...)  
Lillian (looking at him): Okay, now that everyone's here...I have some bad news...  
(The group is waiting in silence)  
Lillian: Back in Far Far Away; a...a guard may have seen me when I was teleporting back.  
Shrek (hastily): That's okay! He doesn't have a tracking device.  
Lillian: It's not okay, actually. He works for the Fairy Godmother now.  
Shrek: Wait a minute! The king works for an obnoxious oversized butterfly?  
Lillian: I did see it! He said "Yes dear".  
(1 second pause)  
Cinderella (horrified): That is not good!  
Ellie: So she wants someone to just listen to her for once. That's really not asking too much! I mean come on. She has to organize potions, give birth, satisfy the occasional unhappy villager, tie herself down to an unenjoyable marriage with someone equally busy, and still be queen! She has it too hard. It's about time she got a break.  
Fiona: Too hard? T-too hard?  
Shrek: Fiona, don't - Fiona: Her life has been nothing but a vacation from Day One! I don't know how she got that wand, but it was wrongfully received. Or...retrieved. Whatever the case; this is how it all happens. She has people to do all of her work; and that includes more than potions. I mean her dirty work. Is the queen in the castle? Yes, but everyone refers to her slaves. Secondly, she doesn't "satisfy" anyone; she tricks and deceives them - and I'll bet my life she doesn't even want to be married. She probably only married him for the money!  
(2 second silence)  
Ellie: I think that is an unfair, premature assumption.  
Fiona: Mine's unfair? I met her. And I'll bet that before we came along; you'd never even seen a human before. Right?  
Ellie: Well, that part's true. But have you met her when she wasn't working? Have you seen her when she was just one of you?  
Fiona: Yes, I have. And frankly, I'd rather see her behind a desk. (pauses) Well, actually, I'd rather see her handcuffed, gagged, blindfolded and tied to a chair; but that's not the point.  
Ellie: Oh...And yet you don't want to do anything to help him?  
Fiona: You really don't get time travel, do you? He only exists in that Far Far Away, in that world. And in this era, this time frame; Far Far Away doesn't exist, period. All those people are erased from time. Dad's gone, the Fairy Godmother's gone, the guards are gone. There are no people, there is no danger, it's all...gone. If we were to go back to that time frame, yes, it would exist; but I don't want to worry about that anymore.  
Diego: What're you talking about?  
Fiona: I'm saying, we need to destroy those machines. Now.  
Lillian: But...  
Fiona: But what? You go back there and you're just...single! Either still mourning over your dead husband or watching him and his other spouse and knowing it should be you. No matter what you try to do, it's over. They are time machines; not alternate realities. I say, make a fresh start. Destroy the machines, live here - whatever it takes to lock away those worlds.  
Peaches (shouting from behind Manny, scaring everyone in the cave): Yeah! Right ON!  
Ellie (as everyone turns to look): Peaches! Oh, um...  
Peaches: Oh, don't look so secretive. This life really can't throw anything in my face.  
Donkey: Ever modest...  
Peaches: Look, ass - if I hadn't heard her say it; someone would've told me. That's what I'm saying.  
Donkey: Oh.  
Peaches: Ass. (looks at Sid) I mean, it's hard to keep secrets in a big group.  
(Sid looks in fear up at Diego, who stands to Sid's right)  
Manny (looking at Fiona): Okay, I have to say something now. It has been bugging me since I first met you.  
(Shrek bristles, ready to defend his wife)  
Manny: You said time travel doesn't affect your age?  
Fiona (as Shrek visibly relaxes): Yeah.  
Manny: I have news for you - we live in time.  
Fiona: Yeah...? Your point?  
Manny: The odds are, we're here and you...are holograms, or whatever. This is the Ice Age. You said you came from our future; well then how could you be alive before your birth?  
Diego: Huh. Maybe they are alternate worlds. Lillian: You know, back in Far Far Away, something did happen and it didn't make any sense.  
(Silence as everyone looks at her)  
Lillian: Well - Diego said Charming built the machines. But in Far Far Away; Charming didn't know anything about time machines. He didn't even know Rapunzel.  
Fiona: And it's my guess Rapunzel built the machines; because she's the only other person even mentioned in this...this...  
Diego: Cow cookie?  
(Fiona looks at the ground in irritation and shakes her head. 2 second pause)  
Rapunzel: I didn't build these time machines! I'm not an evil genius!  
Shrek: So fine, scratch "genius".  
Woody: So you're the one in charge of all this!  
(Confused, everyone looks around but sees nothing)  
Voice: Down here, geniuses.  
(Everyone looks down to find an upset Woody, glaring up at Sid)  
Woody: Listen, freakshow, you gotta tell your pals to find this other time machine and get us back to 1998, Detroit, Michigan. It's important.  
Sid: What's a Michigan?  
Woody: It's our home!  
Sid: From what time frame?!  
Woody (slowly): Nine...teen...Ninety...eight!  
Sid (confused): Is that before or after the Ice Age...  
Woody: Oh for...  
Shrek: Look...cowboy doll - the time machine is destroyed. There's nothing you or your pals can do now but sit down, shut up, and deal with it.  
Peaches (stopping the commotion): How are you even alive?  
Woody: Whaaat...?  
Peaches: Toys don't have souls. Woody: We aren't possessed or anything!  
Sid: How can you be sure?  
Woody: We have souls! End of story!  
Peaches: Do you have parents?  
Woody: No, no, I-I'm a toy.  
Peaches: So how did you learn to talk?  
Woody: Well - we pick it up. Kids talk around us all the time, we hear them...  
Peaches: So how did you learn to understand what they said?  
Donkey (quickly, laughingly): Peaches, stop badgering the knick-knack!  
Woody: Knick knack?!  
Ellie: Well, now hang on a minute; she has a point.  
Woody: Okay! Fine, I'm possessed! We're all possessed! Now how do we get home?!  
(3 second silence)  
Manny: Can't help you, pal.  
(Sid looks over at Diego; who looks at him immediately with a daring expression. Sid shakes his head slowly as Diego smiles, baring his fangs. 2 second silence follows, and then Diego and Sid try to act normally as Fiona speaks to Diego)  
Fiona (as Rapunzel is seen from behind, leaving the cave): So where do we build a settlement?  
Diego: You want to build a house?  
Fiona: Yeah.  
Diego: An entire house.  
Fiona: Well - it's a little necessary, isn't it?  
Diego: Maybe for someone with kids. But good luck gathering enough wood.  
Fiona (disbelieving): So even with all those trees, you doubt we can do it?  
(With a roar, Rudy stomps past; visible only from the knees down)  
Diego (after Rudy had passed): I don't think I need to further illustrate my opinion. Fiona: So where do we go? Where do we live? You can't...guard our lives forever.  
Ellie: I have an idea.  
(Everyone looks at Ellie. 2 second pause before scene fades into next; in which the cave is shown with two of the extra sleeping bags pulled over the entrance; hung over the tree limbs that stretch across it. The other extra sleeping bag hangs across the middlemost exit to the lake; making the cave entirely private whilst the lake is still open to the public. Fiona, along with Cinderella, had teleported back to her old timeline using the only operating time machine and, after several trips, had teleported all neccessities to the cave as well; including four air mattresses - one of them an extra large, for Snow White and Artie. Lillian, Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty got their own air mattress. Shrek and Fiona got their own sleeping bags. Donkey, Puss; Ellie, Manny, Peaches, Tyroko, Sid, Crash, Eddie and Diego, as well as all six of the Dronkeys, slept on the cave ground. Fergus, Farkle and Felicia slept in a beautiful crib brought back from Far Far Away. Gas lanterns had been placed on the ledges of the cave wall. Only one was lit with a bright, dancing flame. Everyone appears to be asleep; but after 5 second pause of the "camera" panning around the newly decorated cave; "camera" pans to Princess Fiona, awake in her sleeping bag. She sighs and rolls over to face Shrek; who opens his eyes and looks right into hers. The fire dances across his face, making him look spooky; and glows against the back of Fiona's head, making her look like an angel)  
Fiona (whisper): You like it here?  
Shrek (whisper): Yeah. Fiona (whisper): Good.  
(3 second pause)  
Shrek (whisper): We need to talk.  
(1 second pause before scene with no transition becomes next; in which Shrek and Fiona are sitting on the steps leading to the lake)  
Shrek: I tried not to tell. But it's driving me crazy!  
Fiona: What is it?  
Shrek: The kids' first birthday...I was only...half there.  
Fiona: You really want to bring this up now?  
Shrek: I have to! It's not what you think.  
(Fiona is quiet)  
Shrek: I was in another universe. (continues as Fiona rolls eyes) No, it's true; listen to me! This is important. Important because of the time machines.  
Fiona: I'm listening...  
(2 second pause)  
Shrek: Shortly after I left the party; I met someone named Rumpelstiltskin. He talked me into signing a contract and it took me to another dimension. An alternate reality. You were a rebel, Puss was fat, Donkey was a slave, the king and queen were dead and he had taken over Far Far Away. None of you guys had ever heard of me! (1 second pause)  
Fiona: And...this ties into the current time how...?  
Shrek: Opinion. See - I don't think that was a time machine. I think that was an alternate reality. Because you said your father had never met Lillian.  
Fiona: Right. But you and I were still married.  
(3 second silence)  
Fiona: Shrek - I'm very sorry that all happened to you. But - you have got to remember that every move you make can change the future. You have got to act responsibly; or things like that could happen whether there's a time machine involved or not.  
(2 second pause)  
Shrek: Did you sign a contract with him too?  
Fiona: No. But I didn't have to. (1 second pause) I was a regular kid, Shrek. A human all the time. Always accepted. Always! And I was just a kid when that spell was cast upon me. That moment, that one lifechanging moment, was my alternate reality. I'm glad to be with you - but before I met you, it hurt. It hurt to know I had to hide. From family. From friends. From the people I wanted to trust - but couldn't! Everything I'd wanted to be was gone. And it was all because that one witch couldn't control her anger.  
(1 second pause)  
Shrek: If she hadn't...d'ya think we would've still met?  
Fiona: Yes. I do. But...who knows, really? We could've wound up enemies.  
Shrek: We sort of were, at first.  
Fiona: You know, I never did apologize for that. I acknowledged that we'd gotten off on the wrong foot; but I never said I was sorry. And it was my fault. I...I was angry.  
Shrek: Well...when you can't laugh, cry or talk; what else can you do but yell?  
Fiona: Stay silent. Think of what to say before you say it. Be smart.  
Shrek: You were smart! Fiona: No, I wasn't. I had set my entire future on a silly fairytale.  
Shrek: You put your faith into your beliefs.  
(1 second pause. Fiona leans against Shrek and he holds her. 2 second pause before scene fades into next; in which Rapunzel is shown walking through a dimly lit forest. She walks straight for 4 seconds; then pauses in her tracks and looks subtly to her left, without moving her head much; hearing a growing thump. Then she turns slowly, in a right turn; keeping her eyes on her focal point. Seconds later, she jerks back as a crash fills the entire forest; silencing all the creatures of the night. A flock of scared owls flies against the blinding white of the large moon. Seconds later, their tree falls down; missing Rapunzel by only inches as she runs in the opposite direction. She cowers behind a tree in stunned silence as Rudy's head appears; his red eyes glowing in the night. He looks right at Rapunzel and approaches slowly; towering over her. He then crouches down, making his head level with hers. Neither move. 3 second silence before Rapunzel draws an invisible line in the air; Rudy's eyes follow her movement forth, then back. Then she reaches out a shaking hand and strokes his giant muzzle. 2 second pause as she withdraws her hand. Rudy makes no attempt to harm her; so she uses her other hand to draw an invisible line in the air. Again, Rudy's eyes follow. Highly uneasy, Rapunzel turns and takes a few steps. Rudy takes one step after her and stops when she stops; simply staring down at her when she looks at him over her shoulder. Trying to conceal her fear; Rapunzel exits the forest and Rudy follows harmlessly. Rudy's deafening footsteps fade into nothingness, leaving a forest filled with silence. 3 second pause before scene fades into next; in which Sid awakens and finds himself only a few feet away from Ellie; whose face is turned to him. He smiles and sits up; but stops smiling when he sees Diego awake and alert, watching him from his place. A fixed expression is on his face. His stare holds for 3 more seconds before Sid averts his eyes. At that, Diego stands and approaches Sid...)  
Diego: Even if she did know, she'd never take you.  
Sid: What makes you so sure?  
Diego: Look at 'er. She's happy the way she is. If you truly loved her; you'd accept it.  
Sid: I can't do that! I would...I would...  
Diego: Die?  
Sid: Yes!  
Diego: Okay. So then we hold it to a vote. Manny's big, you're little. He can protect her - your own shadow scares you. He's smart. (pause)  
(Sid looks as though he's fighting back a response)  
Diego: Sorry, Sid. But - you'll have to get over her. (leaves)  
(2 second silence before Sid pats Ellie's front right leg)  
Sid: I'll never get over you. (oblivious as Ellie's eyes open) And one day I'll tell you when you're awake. (leaves)  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Ellie is dashing outside to join Manny, Peaches and Diego. She stops right in front of Manny and begins hitting him with her trunk; all the while he's trying to defend himself and Diego's watching in curiousity)  
Ellie (stopping after 4 hits): Why would you hide that from me?  
Manny: H-hide what?  
Ellie: I am so mad!  
Manny: Mad why?  
Ellie: If you'd told me sooner that Sid felt that way about me - Manny: Whoa, what? Felt what way?  
Ellie: I think he loves me.  
Manny: WHAT?!  
(2 second silence)  
Ellie (pronouncing as statement): You didn't know.  
Manny: No, I didn't know!  
Ellie (turning to Diego): So why didn't you tell him? Seems like Sid thought you knew.  
Manny (to Diego): You knew?!  
Diego: Don't you have bigger fish to fry?  
(Manny wordlessly goes back into the cave to find Sid; so Ellie looks at Diego. 2 second pause)  
Diego: Yeah, okay, I knew.  
Ellie: You're such an...(follows Manny)  
(2 second silence)  
Diego (to Peaches, after sighing): Should've made Sid run my errands.  
(4 second silence before Sid, narrowly missing Peaches, flies headfirst out of the cave and lands headfirst in the snow)  
Manny (from inside cave): Now get lost!  
(Peaches and Diego watch in silence as Sid gets up and runs in the opposite direction)  
Diego (to Peaches, making her laugh): I'll get by.  
(Meanwhile, inside...)  
Ellie: I can't...believe...you did it again, Manny.  
Manny: Ellie, you don't look so good.  
Ellie: I love you too.  
Manny: No, I mean it. You look awful.  
(Ellie sighs)  
(6 second silence)  
Manny: This doesn't...change anything...does it? (Ellie looks at him) I mean, we just stopped arguing, and...And I didn't know...  
Ellie: I'm not mad at you for that. Actually I'm mad at Diego for that. I'm mad at you for throwing him into the wild.  
Manny: He loves you. As your mate - what choice did I have?  
Ellie: Well, he's tiny; he's defenseless - I was hoping you'd have a more reasonable approach.  
Manny: Like what?  
Ellie: I don't know...anything else?  
Manny: You mean, use him as a streetsweeper?  
Ellie: No!  
Lillian: Might I interject something here?  
(2 second silence)  
Lillian (looking at Manny): I think you're being unfair. Why, I think you should be thanking the guy.  
Manny (making Ellie glare at him): For what? Threatening what little I have?  
Lillian: No. For...genuinely caring about someone you care about.  
Ellie: Okay, stop! Stop right there! (turns to Manny) What do you mean, "what little you have"?  
Manny: Uhh...uhh...  
Diego: Wow. You have done it again. You have four feet, buddy, and you've managed to put them all into your mouth at once.  
Manny: You aren't helping.  
Diego (heading for the stairs leading to the lake): You prefer Sid?  
Manny: Oh, that...that's...No. (Attempts to speak to Ellie as Diego disappears down the steps) You know I didn't - Ellie: Oh, shut up. (stomps out of cave)  
(Scene fades into next; in which the sun is rising, coloring the sky and the surface of the lake a hazy reddish hue. Diego is jogging around the lake; Fiona watches from the cave's lake entrance. "Camera view" becomes next with no transition to show a closeup of Diego as he slows his speed and stops beside a rock. He looks to his right, then left; and finally jumps up onto the rock. Gripping at the edges with his claws; he looks east to see the volcano, calm as death; a mere silhouette against the rising sun. 3 second silence)  
Voice: Having fun up there?  
(Diego looks down to his left to see Rapunzel)  
Diego: Why're you back here?  
Rapunzel: Boredom. Oh, and I brought a friend with me. (points behind Diego)  
Diego (looking over his left shoulder to see Rudy; then back at Rapunzel): Also out of boredom?  
Rapunzel: How well you know me.  
Diego (making Rapunzel sneer): It's important to know one's enemy.  
Rapunzel: So then what's keeping you from scratching my eyes out? Could it be Rudy's presence, perhaps?  
Diego (sitting): Tell you what. Dragon and Rudy fight; and the winning team keeps the cave.  
Rapunzel: Or, since my team is smaller than yours; you just hand it over to me right now.  
Diego: Or you march right into that cave and take it from us. Final offer.  
Rapunzel (looking from Diego to the cave; and then back to Diego): How about we reconsider the first offer?  
Diego (plainly): I like the way you think.  
Rapunzel: Excuse me. (heads toward cave; Rudy follows)  
Diego (to self): If only I could.  
(Scene fades into next; in which Dragon and Rudy are standing in the front of the cave)  
Fiona: This is ridiculous! Peaches: More ridiculous than time-travelling to revive a dead spouse?  
(2 second pause)  
Fiona: Yes.  
(Conversation is stopped short as Rudy makes the first move; barely growling at Dragon. Dragon lets out a full-fledged roar at the smaller creature; who begins to advance on Dragon. She blows fire at him; but he ducks. The wall of flames instead "connect" with the nearest tree; damaging its weakened state, at which point the tree falls over and crushes Rudy's tail. Rudy is pinned in his place as Dragon advances toward him. But then, Rudy ducks and uses his tail to fling the tree branch in Dragon's direction. She too ducks; and the crew inside the cave scatters as the tree branch smashes into the cave entrance, shaking the entire area. Distracted by his misfire; Rudy doesn't see the second wall of flames threatening his life. "Camera" quickly pans to Shrek and the others as Rudy falls unseen to his death. Slowly, Fiona pulls out of Shrek's arms and makes herself look. She sees Rapunzel storm toward the exit; but stop in her tracks and face Fiona instead)  
Rapunzel: Fine. You win. Keep the cave. But I still own you.  
Fiona: Excuse me?  
Rapunzel: Oh yes, Fiona. See...I know more about your life than you do. Would you like to know why?  
Fiona: Yes. I would.  
(Rapunzel, smiling evilly, begins to back up; but Dragon quickly blocks the entrance. Rapunzel turns in shock as her back connects with Dragon's front right foot. Rapunzel sighs in annoyance and turns back to Fiona)  
Fiona: You aren't leaving until I know.  
Rapunzel: Fine. See - your father paid Puss In Boots to kill Shrek in your original universe.  
Fiona/Queen Lillian (as Shrek covers both eyes with both hands and slumps against the wall): What?!  
Rapunzel: And Puss In Boots actually tried doing it, too. I saw it for myself. 'Bye-'bye, now. (leaves)  
Fiona (turning to Puss In Boots): Well?  
(2 second pause)  
Puss In Boots (sheepishly): Sorry, princesa.  
Cinderella (quietly, to Snow White): Whoa. Suddenly your secret's minor.  
Snow White (quietly, in response): It always was minor. I would've told you at the right time.  
Cinderella (quietly): Right after, is the right time.  
Snow White (not so quietly): Y'know what, you don't know what it's like. So until you do; just shut up! (stomps out of cave; Artie follows quickly, still carrying Rosie)  
(Snow White gets into their carriage; Artie follows)  
Artie (placing Rosie in carseat): Is it that bad?  
Snow White: They're that bad. I want to go home.  
Artie: Well...there is still a working time machine.  
Snow White (happier): There is? Where?  
Artie: Down the stairs, in the cave.  
(2 second pause)  
Snow White (hugging Artie): Oh, thank you! Let's sneak out tonight!  
Artie (resisting): We can't.  
Snow White (pulling away): Why not?  
Artie (looking into her angry eyes): Well, we could - but we'd never see them again. (points toward cave)  
Snow White: Yes we would! Remember? Fiona's mom was talking about the Fairy Godmother and Prince Charming. It'll all be just the same - better!  
Artie: Uhh - in case you forgot; the Fairy Godmother was married to the King. It won't be the same. Even if you do see Fiona and everyone else; they might not remember you.  
Snow White: Don't you mean "us"?  
Artie: I can't go.  
Snow White (impatiently): Why...not. Give me one good reason.  
Artie: I'll give you five. My cousin, my aunt, my nephews, my niece, and my daughter.  
Snow White: Maybe your daughter will go with your wife.  
Artie: Don't make me choose.  
Snow White: I'm not making you choose. I'm saying, you have a choice. There's a dividing line between them.  
Artie: Well, it's pretty thin.  
(3 second pause)  
Artie: There is no way I'm "sneaking" anywhere tonight. I just got settled.  
Snow White: Settled? You think this is settled? A dinosaur was just killed in front of you.  
Artie: So? At least his killer is on our side! Who knows what would change if we went back now!  
Snow White: Well, our daughter would be safer!  
Artie: What if Dragon turns against us too - like the King did? Prince Charming - he's alive back there. You really want Rosie growing up in a world with him in it?  
Snow White: Prince Charming is nothing compared to a bunch of dinosaurs. I can't stay with you if you're going to be that careless about our own daughter's safety.  
(5 second silence)  
Artie: Alright. We'll go. But I want to tell everyone first.  
Snow White: We'll never get out if we say something.  
Artie: Oh, so they have a choice and I don't? Just how many people are you married to?  
Snow White: Keep talking like that, not one.  
(3 second pause)  
Artie: Fine. But I'm leaving a note.  
(2 second pause)  
Snow White: Yeah, alright.  
(1 second pause before scene fades into next; in which the afternoon sky is unmet with sunshine. Snow hazily falls down; disappearing with the blanket of snow on the ground. Diego's head looms close to Cinderella's ear and she stirs uncomfortably; but only opens her eyes when he growls near her ear. She sits up hastily, seeing Diego so close...)  
Cinderella: Hey! What gives?  
Diego: Thought you should know that two of your friends ditched you last night. They snuck out.  
Cinderella: Why would you wait so long to tell me?  
Diego: Because they chose to do it. You aren't joined at the hip and I'm getting real sick of this clique stuff.  
Cinderella: True friends stick together - especially in times of danger.  
Diego: They have a baby now. I think their family should come first - at all costs.  
Cinderella: How would you know? (getting up, mumbles to self) Dumb tiger. Thinks he knows family business, has no family...  
Diego: Yes I do.  
(Cinderella looks plainly at him)  
Diego: They didn't disown me. I ran away. Cinderella: Why?  
Diego: They acted like a clique. And when I didn't qualify, they tried forcing me into change. Didn't like that, so I took off.  
Cinderella: Well, it's not the same thing. Snow and Artie weren't being forced into anything.  
Diego: Did they want to come here?  
Cinderella (after a pause): Well, no, not at first, but - Diego: Did you mean what you said yesterday during your fight; or were you just teasing?  
Cinderella: I meant it. A little. But - Diego: But, she's a parent now. I think her concerns are extended past childish grievances. And in any case, Snow White shouldn't have been on a road trip so close to childbirth. If you don't understand that, maybe it's for the better they took off. If they decide somewhere down the line that they need a vacation, they'll need someone more reliable to look after Rosie.  
(3 second pause)  
Cinderella: Hey, that's completely unfair; I am a good friend.  
Diego: Really. Think about last night and then get back to me on that. (leaves)  
Manny (neutrally): You're sinister.  
Diego (passing without even giving him a glance): You know what they say, pal - you go soft, you die.  
(Manny stares after him. Diego does finally turn around to face him...)  
Diego: Look, I have some business to take care of. I'll be back.  
Manny: What's up?  
Diego: Tempers. Long story short, Fiona's cousin and his wife took off last night with their kid.  
Manny: Ah, and you're escaping! Shrewd.  
Diego: I'm not escaping. I'm not like they are; I'll be back. But this can't wait.  
Manny: Okay. Well then.  
Diego: See you 'round, buddy. (turns and leaves; Manny watches for a few seconds before looking into the cave, inside which he can see, rather than hear, the fight brewing inside it. Manny's expression goes from from wary to worried as he keeps watching. As the instrumental for "Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice plays, scene fades slowly to black)  
* * *


	3. Chapter 3

**PART 3 05.14.12 - 08.16.12 **  
*** * ***

(Snow White and Artie are ejected into Far Far Away)  
Artie: Please tell me you have Rosie.  
Snow White: What?! No, you had her!  
Artie: Not anymore...  
(3 second silence before Artie looks around. Snow White looks frozen in fear and grief. Scene slowly fades into next; in which Dragon is flying solo over snow-covered land. A heavy diagonal snowfall blots her surroundings. "Camera" pans downward to Shrek and Fiona, who watch her pass overhead. Then, holding hands, they walk away from the commotion of the cave; moving along the strip of land that would take them to the island)  
Shrek: Do you know where Diego went?  
Fiona: No. But he had some business to take care of, and he had to leave to do it.  
Shrek: By himself? Fiona (irritably): You know, Shrek, some things have to be done that way.  
Shrek (confused): Okay...  
Fiona (still irritable): Okay.  
(3 second silence)  
Shrek: So - you aren't going to leave too?  
Fiona (more irritable): Why would you feel the need to question me?  
Shrek: Well...you've left before...  
Fiona: Do you want me to leave?  
(1 second silence)  
Shrek: No. Just thinking.  
Fiona: No, see - thinking is done quietly. You're talking. And I don't appreciate where it's going.  
Shrek: I haven't gotten there yet!  
Fiona: So speak carefully.  
Shrek: Do you want to stay here? (5 second pause, during which she looks at him)  
Fiona: Shrek...Far Far Away is a disaster.  
Shrek: Well...what if it wasn't?  
(Fiona stops walking and looks up at him. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Manny is lost to a world of rage...)  
Queen Lilian: I hate to stereotype, but - Manny (pacing): Then don't.  
Queen Lilian: ...But, I'm almost glad the Diego fellow left. He belongs with the friends he left you for.  
Ellie: Don't you think that's a little harsh?  
Queen Lilian: Not one bit. There are babies in this cave, Ellie, and that creature would've killed at least one, for sure.  
Peaches: Okay, I know you have a grudge against sabers because of what happened; but Diego's different. Queen Lilian: He doesn't look any different.  
Peaches: Regardless. Your niece isn't here anymore; you can stop being such a stick in the mud.  
(2 second silence)  
Voice: Wow, it's just as cold inside as it is outside.  
(Manny, Ellie, Peaches and Queen Lilian turn to see Nigel the seagull perched on a ledge, watching them)  
Ellie: Who're you?  
Nigel: Name's Nigel, folks! Eh, you don't mind if I crash here for awhile - make a nest someplace?  
Ellie (slowly): No...Be our guest.  
Nigel: Thanks. (flies to a premade nest; Ellie and Manny stare after him in wonder)  
Ellie (quietly): How long you think he's been there?  
Manny: How would I know?  
Ellie: You're right, dear. You're absolutely right. (turns to leave)  
Manny (blinking and looking at her): What? Hey!  
(Ellie looks smug. She stands at one of the entrances of the cave and peers out toward the island; where Shrek and Fiona are dimly silhouetted against the moon. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Shrek and Fiona are centered...)  
Fiona: Okay - maybe it is a little tempting. But, Shrek, I still don't like the idea of time travel. There's just something...wrong with it. Yes, the thought of our capabilities now is amazing. But how will our children learn how to fend for themselves if we don't teach them? I don't want to be that kind of parent.  
Shrek: Well, I think if we use the time machine; we can bust our way to Far Far Away or the swamp or whatever, before it was all messed up. Things can be right again, but sometimes it has to be made that way.  
Fiona: Well, you know what, Shrek...I can't. I can't 'bust my way' anywhere. Mom did it and almost got caught. Now my cousin and his wife are out there somewhere, meeting who knows who, doing who knows what, and who knows what will happen! We're safe here.  
Shrek: Lighten up! No one's going anywhere; I'm just talking.  
Fiona: About leaving.  
Shrek: Fiona, why are you so huffy tonight? I'd understand if you were pregnant, but... (pauses as Fiona looks away) ...Fiona? We already have the three. Are you...  
Fiona: No! (continues as Shrek sighs in relief) There's just something horribly wrong with time travel. It's not our choice, it messes things up...I mean, if Artie or Snow White do one thing wrong, I might...not exist tomorrow!  
(Fiona and Shrek are both silent for a few minutes, looking around hesitantly)  
Shrek: I think you're safe.  
Fiona: Yeah. For now.  
Shrek (tired): Okay, I'll go see if the time machine still works...  
Fiona: If it does?  
Shrek: Then I guess...we can leave.  
Fiona: Good.  
Shrek: I thought you didn't want to leave.  
Fiona: That was before I considered how things could go! Good grief, let's do this already! (runs toward cave; Shrek follows)  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Fiona bursts inside; scaring Nigel off the edge of his nest. He lands with a thump just as Fiona rushes past him and heads toward the stairs leading down...)  
Manny: Where's the fire?  
Fiona: Apparently a few million years ago!  
Ellie: What?  
Shrek (calmly entering cave): Who knows? (Smiling at his joke; Shrek follows Fiona...)  
Fiona (studying the machine): Okay. Okay, never mind. Look. (continues as Shrek looks) They're back right where we were before we ever came here. They're safe.  
Shrek: Of course they are. We're the problem.  
Fiona: What?  
Shrek: Think about it. That right there is the future of this, right here. If anyone is gonna fade from existence, it'll be them.  
(3 second pause)  
Shrek: We've got to go back.  
(2 second pause before scene fades into next; in which it is nightfall and everyone is asleep - except for Fiona; who restlessly rolls over in her sleeping bag. Her eyes slowly open, and then lock on a shadow moving subtly beyond the cave's curtain door. She stands and silently makes her way to the curtain. She peeks outside to see Aia facing her, looking down at Sid; standing to Aia's right. Both are oblivious...)  
Aia: I just don't believe you, I'm sorry; but there is no cave here.  
Sid: Yes, there is! Somewhere. They hid it, to get away from the dinos.  
Aia: Find it.  
Fiona (in a low voice): Hey, you.  
(Aia and Sid look up to see an ogre head floating eerily. Sid, with a gasp, hides behind Aia's leg; and Aia is frozen in sheer terror, hardly allowing herself to breathe. Fiona then pushes back the curtain and steps outside; and Sid faints. Aia simply smiles, unaware of her friend's condition as she vaguely steps over him, missing him narrowly)  
Aia (with obvious relief in her voice): I'm so glad it's you!  
Fiona (gesturing behind her): It's all of us.  
(Aia peers inside)  
Fiona: What're you doing here?  
Aia: Reuniting Sid with his herd. (turns to smile at Sid, sees him lying unconscious on the ground, and gives Fiona an anxious look before hurrying over to him. She uses her trunk to sweep snow against his head, creating a half-pillow. She does this until he is entirely framed with snow; then stands back) Fiona: What...  
Aia: Three...two...one...  
(Sid stirs and then sits up, looking confused. Aia smiles at Fiona. Sid looks up at Aia, then at Fiona...)  
Aia: So, can we come inside?  
Fiona: Yes, but a little warning - it's getting crowded. And that's without Diego!  
Sid: Where is he?  
Fiona: Ask Manny.  
Sid: Manny hates me!  
Aia: It's okay, I won't let him touch you.  
(Sid beams, and the trio enters the cave)  
Aia (whispering to Fiona): I was worried Ellie was mad at me when y'all left without telling me anything of it.  
Fiona: Sorry. We couldn't find you.  
Aia: Then you must've left around the time I was teaching Sid how to attack crabs. He's gettin' to be quite crafty, y'know!  
Sid: She even taught me how to outrun her!  
Fiona (neutrally): That's cool.  
Aia: Hey, you okay?  
Fiona: Uh, yeah. (continues as Sid and Aia exhange looks) Goodnight.  
Sid/Aia: Goodnight...  
("Camera" focuses on Fiona's face; which is creased with worry. She blinks back tears. Scene fades into next; in which the rays of sun shine through the trees, highlighting the falling snowflakes. Inside the cave; Manny awakens to see Sid asleep next to Aia; who's looking up at him with a daring expression)  
Aia: Try it, Manfred.  
Manny: Well, now that I have your blessing...  
Aia: Look, you're gonna have to get over it. He doesn't love her anymore.  
Manny: Why should I believe you?  
Aia: 'Cuz he's dating me.  
Manny: I hope he is! Otherwise Ellie has one messed up niece.  
Aia: I am not messed up.  
(2 second silence)  
Manny: I'll be watching you today. (retreats to Ellie's side; stiffens as Sid awakens. Their gazes lock. Before anyone can say or do anything else; Lenny enters the cave...)  
Sid: Wow, you've gotten fat, Diego!  
Lenny: What?  
Sid: Oh, no offense. Welcome back, buddy!  
Lenny: I'm not Diego, you creep!  
(1 second pause)  
Sid: Are you sure?  
(Manny rolls his eyes)  
Lenny: I'll eat you.  
Sid: Okay, okay! (backs off)  
Manny: What do you want?  
Lenny: Nothing - but I figured you ought to know...Diego's dead.  
Ellie (abruptly awakening): What?!  
Lenny: Yeah. He passed by me on a business trip. Looked tired, so I let him sleep in my cave. Fell asleep last night - never woke up.  
Manny: That doesn't make any sense. Why would you let him sleep in your favorite place after what you've done to him?  
Lenny: I felt bad. He told me about the amnesia the night before his death. I had no idea! (3 second pause of shock) Guys, I'm real sorry. (turns to leave)  
Ellie: How did you know where to find us?  
Lenny: He told me. (leaves)  
Manny: Ellie, don't you believe him. Why would Diego tell him where we are?  
Ellie (sounding unconvinced): Yeah. Yeah, you're right.  
(Manny smiles and turns away; and Ellie looks down with a grimace)  
Ellie (whispering): Why...Why would he do that...(opens eyes, in which tears begin forming. Behind her, the sun spots on the curtain become shady. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which the sun hides behind gathering clouds. The snow begins to fall harder; the flakes, now falling on an angle, becoming smaller. Scene fades into next; in which Lillian is being taught how to skate by Manny, Sid, and Aia. Ellie is watching from a distance, laughing. "Camera" tilts toward the cave; showing a very serious Fiona watching from the middlemost entrance. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Fiona is approached by Shrek...)  
Shrek: So, I guess we'll be goin' soon.  
Fiona: Go?  
Shrek: You know, to see where Artie's at.  
Fiona: Oh. Uh...Yeah, sure.  
Shrek: Are you okay?  
(no answer)  
Shrek: Fiona?  
Fiona: Something bad's about to happen. I know it.  
Shrek: Like what?  
Fiona: I don't know. Just...something.  
Donkey: Ya know what helps sometimes? Goin' for a walk to clear your mind.  
Fiona (looking at him): I'm willing to try almost anything. (squeezes Shrek's shoulder, pats Donkey's head, and leaves the cave)  
Puss in Boots (skeptically): Nice job, ass.  
Donkey: What?  
Peaches (dauntingly): You just sent her out alone when she has a bad feeling.  
Donkey (as Shrek begins to get riled up): She just needs to calm down, you'll see! It'll be fine.  
Puss in Boots: You don't know that.  
Donkey: You're just waiting for bad things to happen, man. You won't be happy that way.  
Puss in Boots: Maybe not. But I, for one, won't be disappointed when things go wrong. I will only be correct.  
Donkey: Ah, you're gettin' me down. (leaves)  
Puss in Boots (mutter): Maybe from his high horse...  
Peaches (following Donkey): "Getting you down"? Are you serious? Diego could actually be dead and you don't feel a thing?  
Donkey: What makes you think that creature was tellin' the truth?  
Crash: Hey, don't you doubt this one; she's a genius.  
Manny: He's not dead.  
Donkey: Listen to Daddy, genius.  
Peaches: Bite me.  
(2 second pause, during which everyone within hearing range of Peaches looks at her in shock. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Fiona is shown walking through almost three feet of snow. The cave is now just a speck in the distance; and small snow-flakes still fall on the same angle. Fiona stops at a wounded sound and surveys her surroundings. She sees a trail of pink in the snow, almost covered. She follows it and finds Zeke, lying in the snow, fighting for his life...)  
Fiona: Oh, poor thing...  
(Zeke looks up at Fiona and she pauses in recognition. She hesitantly gets down on her knees, slowly offers a hand, and then pets him on the head)  
Zeke: Kill...me...  
(Fiona jerks back in surprise)  
Zeke: I don't...Can't...  
(Fiona studies him, recalling last night. She slowly begins pushing snow against his injuries. When finished, she stands...)  
Fiona: I'll be right back. (turns around and runs back to the cave)  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Shrek is preparing items for the trip back in time to Far Far Away. He opens up Lillian's duffel bag, which she had allowed him to use. He begins putting things inside. Seconds later, Fiona rips into the cave, looks around wildly, grabs the emergency kit out of Lillian's duffel bag, and runs off. Shrek goes to the cave entrance and watches his wife run toward a tiny orange speck in the distance)  
Shrek (as Manny enters the cave): Look.  
(Manny stands behind Shrek and peers out)  
Shrek: Isn't that...uh...  
Manny: Get outta my way.  
(Shrek moves and Manny follows Fiona; Ellie, Shrek and Aia follow Manny)  
(Meanwhile, Fiona approaches Zeke and drops to her knees in the snow)  
Fiona: This might sting a bit; but it'll help you.  
Zeke: Death...will help most.  
Fiona: Well, I'm not doing that.  
Zeke: Gonna make...me suffer, huh?  
Fiona: No. This'll let you heal.  
Zeke: I...doubt it.  
Manny (approaching): Is he hurt?  
Fiona: Yes!  
Manny (approaches): It's not him! (turns to Ellie, lifts trunk)  
Ellie (tapping Aia with trunk): It's okay, it's not Diego!  
Aia: Good.  
MEANWHILE...  
Zeke: Just...end it!  
Fiona: No. Trust me, once this heals you'll be glad to be alive. You sure are lucky.  
Zeke: I don't know about that. (grimaces as Fiona begins tending to his injury) How long will this take?  
Fiona: Oh, a few minutes, I think.  
Zeke: I meant...the healing.  
Fiona: Oh...Um...It's hard to say.  
Manny (studying the injury): Three weeks, in the very least.  
Zeke: And in the...most?  
Manny: Half a year...a full year...never. (Fiona glares) Hard to say!  
Zeke: Ow! Son of a -  
Fiona: Sorry! I'm so sorry.  
(2 second pause)  
Zeke (breathless): No one - no one can ever...know about...(bows head, unable to finish)  
Fiona: I know. (pauses, examines the injury)  
Manny: That's all you can do for it.  
Fiona: Okay. Done.  
(3 second pause)  
Zeke: Now what?  
("Camera" focuses on Zeke's face as Fiona is seen in the background, silently pleading with Manny; who eventually gives in)  
Fiona: You're staying with us.  
Zeke: What? No, that's crazy. No one can know.  
Fiona: Look at you. You're in no position to get up. And you're going to need to change your bandages a lot. You'll need help!  
Zeke: More than half my pack died without assistance. I'm not your problem either.  
(2 second pause)  
Fiona: Yes you are. Manny?  
Manny: Crap, here goes. (lifts a startled Zeke into the air and begins slowly carrying him back to the cave)  
Fiona (following at the same pace): Listen, you're of the same species...Do you know anything about Diego?  
Zeke: No. Why?  
Fiona: We're told he's dead.  
Zeke: What? By who?!  
Fiona: Um...Um...Did you catch his name, Manny?  
Manny (flatly): Lenny.  
Zeke: Oh, for...That's not good.  
Fiona: What do you mean?  
Zeke: If the news came from Lenny, it's probably true. He was elected pack leader after Soto died.  
(3 second silence before scene fades into next; in which Manny carries Zeke into the cave. Fiona is next to enter)  
Manny: Any specific place you want to be?  
Zeke: Down there. (stares at the rock formation leading to the tunnels)  
(Manny starts toward the steps and pauses; realizing he can't walk down them. He instead goes to the ledge overlooking them and hangs Zeke down over it. He's able to deposit Zeke onto the floor without trouble; placing him right under the ledge, out of view entirely)  
Zeke (unhappily): Thanks.  
Manny: Yeah, whatever. (goes out to the frozen lake with the others)  
Fiona: Do you need anything - aside from death?  
Zeke: No. (pauses) Don't tell anyone, got it? Don't even mention me. And tell that to the mammoth.  
Fiona: Okay. Zeke: Now.  
(Fiona leaves the cave, catching up easily to Manny. She approaches to his right)  
Manny: Still holding his own?  
Fiona: Yes. And he doesn't want us to tell anyone he's there.  
Manny: I've already forgotten.  
Fiona: Good. I'm sure he appreciates that.  
Manny: Who appreciates what?  
(Fiona looks at him, and he ignores her. As they keep walking, Fiona keeps stealing glances at him. Finally, he looks at her just as she looks at him; and their gazes lock...)  
Manny: What?  
Fiona: Shrek and I are leaving soon.  
(2 second pause)  
Manny: You're taking your kids with you, right? (snickers)  
Fiona: Well, obviously.  
Manny: Ah, lighten up, I'm teasin'.  
Fiona: Must you?  
(1 second pause)  
Fiona: Don't you think I have enough to think about without you making a joke out of it?  
Manny: Sorry, I...wasn't thinking.  
(Fiona turns and walks ahead; and Ellie approaches Manny from his left)  
Ellie: Now that's an apology.  
Manny: I suppose I owe you one too...  
Ellie: Not me. (looks over at Sid)  
Manny: You're kidding.  
Ellie: What - Manny: I need to apologize - because he hit on the one person who means something to me?  
Ellie: Oh, that's so sweet! Yes.  
Manny: Agh. (heads toward Sid; Ellie watches in satisfaction. Aia, already standing close to Sid, stiffens as Manny gets closer. Manny stops almost ten paces away from Sid...)  
Manny: Okay, so maybe...I can't. I can't. (Turns away toward Ellie, who makes a lethal expression at him. He turns back to Sid at his voice...)  
Sid: Can't do what?  
Manny: Umm...Apologize...  
Sid: For what?  
Manny: Okay. Cool, that's...big of you...?  
Sid: No, really. For what?  
Manny: Ahh...nothing, forget I said it. (retreats back to Ellie)  
Ellie: Went well?  
Manny: Yeah, perfect. (follows Ellie back inside cave; stopping only once to look over his shoulder at Sid, who is helping Aia attack crabs. "Camera" focuses on Sid, who peers into the fishing hole in the ice just in time to see a clownfish swim by. Sid looks up at Aia in shock. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Marlin is seen swimming cautiously toward the swimming hole; through which Sid peers as he gets down on all fours...)  
Sid: Oh - hey little fella!  
(Marlin swims nervously backward; then spins around and keeps swimming the way he was going)  
Aia: Who you talkin' to?  
Sid: Ah, he's gone.  
(Sid stands up as scene fades into next; in which Buzz, Rex, Mr. Potato Head, Woody, Hamm, and Slink are seen returning to the cave in which they'd left Barbie, Mrs. Potato Head, and Jessie)  
Mrs. Potato Head (standing): Ah, there's my hot potato!  
Jessie (as Buzz enters the room): Buzz! (races into his arms)  
Rex: Oh, yeah, no, I'm fine by the way.  
Woody: Sorry.  
(2 second pause)  
Buzz: Okay, this little journey of ours has gone on long enough. Detroit's waiting for us, troops, and we're gonna get there.  
Jessie: And how do you suggest we do that?  
Buzz (looking up at the sky just in time to see Dragon pass overhead): Well, if my directions are correct; she just left her current shelter. I say we write in the snow. Gather up anything you can find, and hurry. I don't know how much time we've got.  
(3 second pause as looks are exchanged amongst the group. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Jessie is shown dumping a tiny armful of rocks onto the snow. She is joined by Hamm, who pulls out his cork and lets a decent amount of pebbles fall out onto the snow)  
Woody: That was smart, Hamm!  
Jessie: Oh, what's the point? It's been hours since we saw that bird.  
Woody: We're not giving up. (The guys leave to do more collecting. 2 second pause)  
Mrs. Potato Head: Well, you've been awfully quiet there, Barbie.  
Jessie: Tell me about it. For awhile it was like you weren't even with us.  
Barbie: I wasn't, but thanks for noticing.  
Jessie: Where were you?  
Barbie: Following them. (points to Buzz)  
Mrs. Potato Head: And they didn't see you?  
Barbie: It's pretty easy to learn to sneak around when your family consists of thirty G.I. Joes.  
MEANWHILE...  
Buzz: Uh-oh.  
Woody: What?  
Buzz: I think they're talking about me.  
Hamm (passing him with a load of sticks popping out of his coin slot): I wouldn't doubt it. You get into a relationship and that's when it all starts.  
(3 second pause as Buzz and Woody look after him; then look at each other. Scene fades into next; in which the distant sounds of a seagull chirping and laughter accompanying it awakens Zeke in the cave. He opens his eyes and lifts his head to find Fiona standing a few feet away)  
Fiona: Need something yet?  
Zeke (trying to smile): Something to eat would be nice.  
Fiona: Anything special?  
Zeke: Nah, just...whatever there is.  
Fiona: Okay...(leaves hesitantly)  
Zeke: Wait - (Fiona pauses, standing only near the stair formation leading up)  
Zeke: Thanks.  
(Fiona simply smiles to herself and continues on her way. She gets just outside of the cave to find Lenny standing there; looking right at her)  
Fiona: Uhh - I'm sorry, can I help you with something?  
Lenny: Yeah, you can tell me why you're holding him hostage.  
Fiona: We're not holding anyone hostage.  
Lenny: My kind doesn't associate with your kind. Now release him to me.  
Fiona: He can't exactly move right now, Lenny. Lenny: Very well, then - if you won't cooperate, I'll take him by force.  
Fiona: You go right ahead. It's between you and him now. I'll just have you know he's grateful to be here.  
Lenny: I'll have to hear that for myself. (goes inside)  
(5 second pause)  
Zeke: I said get lost!  
(2 second pause before Lenny comes walking back outside. He looks at Fiona, who simply watches him expressionlessly...)  
Fiona: I tried to tell you...  
Lenny: Well, your effort was futile.  
(3 second pause, during which Fiona muffles her laughter. Lenny blinks, realizing he has just insulted himself. He then turns and stalks away. Shaking her head, Fiona turns and ducks neatly around the corner; fading behind the curtain)  
Shrek (approaching her): Okay, I'm ready.  
Fiona: For what?  
(2 second pause)  
Shrek: Artie. Remember?  
Fiona: Oh! Oh, okay. (Shrek turns east; facing the volcano. Putting an arm around his wife's shoulders; they watch it erupt against the dark clouds; creating a magnificent contrast. From outside, shocked yelps and excited exclamations catch their attention. "Camera" slowly pans to Fiona's left; catching the familar shadow as it falls across the cave wall. Fiona notices it immediately and turns her gaze back to the scene before her, sighing in annoyance)  
Fiona: I thought Zeke told you to get lost, Lenny.  
Diego: Why would Zeke say that?  
(Shrek and Fiona spin around in surprise)  
Fiona: You're alive, you're back!  
Shrek: Welcome.  
Zeke (voice from below): I don't get it. You're dead.  
Diego (deadpan): That's a laugh. (turns back to Shrek and Fiona) Excuse me a moment. (3 second pause as he is shown taking the nearest exit outside to the lake and walking down the slope leading to the ground. Unnoticed, Diego walks right up behind Sid; who only then realizes something's different...)  
Sid: Uh-oh.  
Manny (looks and smiles): Well, look who's back.  
(Sid looks and, with a joyous shout, automatically hugs Diego's leg)  
Diego: My mistake. (shakes his paw just once and lets him fall hard to the dirt; after which Sid is enveloped in a cloud of dust)  
Manny: Where were ya - buddy?  
(Diego looks away and is unresponsive for almost 5 seconds. Then he looks back up...)  
Diego: I found my family. We couldn't visit long, so I told them where we were. They said they'd swing by. Anyone come over?  
Manny: Just Lenny.  
Diego (still deadpan): Oh, good. I didn't miss anything.  
(Manny snickers)  
Fiona (from behind Diego): Okay, Fergus...Farkle...Up you get...  
(Diego looks over his right shoulder to see Fiona holding the boys, and Shrek picking up Felicia. Without looking away, Diego turns to face them directly and then looks over his left shoulder at Manny, who shrugs. Diego looks back at Shrek and Fiona as an unfamiliar sound resonates somewhere in the distance...)  
Fiona: You're gonna have your first babysitter now for awhile.  
Shrek: That's right; Mommy and Daddy have some business to take care of.  
Felicia: When'll you be back?  
Shrek: Soon, very soon.  
Fergus: Okay!  
Fiona: Okay. (They slowly set the kids down on the ground)  
Fiona: That was easy. For them.  
Shrek: Tell me about it.  
(Dragon makes a noise; almost crouching next to Donkey)  
Donkey: Uh-oh.  
Peaches: What?  
Donkey: Somethin' just broke easterly; now it's spittin' fire.  
Peaches: Easterly?  
Donkey: Y'know, the whole volcano thing in the east, the one that keeps the lake warm.  
Peaches: Oh God. Oh no. Oh wow.  
Ellie: She's speechless!  
Manny: We're finished!  
Fiona (laughing): Peaches! Calm down! What is it?  
Peaches: Our cave was in the east. Don't you guys get it? The volcano is what's melting the ice! Which means...our cave is already getting buried in ash.  
(1 second pause)  
Shrek: And over here...  
Peaches (realizing): And this cave's going to get flooded!  
Shrek: Right.  
Aia: Why?  
Fiona: Hello, it's spitting lava!  
Peaches (making Donkey look insulted): Yes, if you want to use layman's terms.  
Fiona: So Peachify it.  
Peaches: Naturally. (pauses briefly) In case you haven't noticed, we're surrounded by mountains and snow. All that ice will melt; and we will go underwater.  
Aia: Even up here?  
Peaches: That volano, notoriously known as Doom Chute of Lava Falls, is almost on a perfectly vertical angle. It is named the Doom Chute because its history of volcanic eruptions go on for days; which means we'll be flooded out before those days are even up.  
Shrek: What does the volcano's angle have to do with it?  
Peaches: Everything! The straighter the slope, the faster the lava will travel. Take a look outside.  
(Shrek is not the only one to look. The lava is still blasting from the mouth of the volcano; and the lava already erupted is more than halfway down the volcano)  
Peaches: Think of the volcano as the groundhog and the lava as its shadow.  
(2 second pause)  
Diego: We're screwed.  
Peaches: Yep. Goodness, and I thought the ass used layman's terms.  
Donkey: Hey!  
Ellie: So if the world is at such a critical moment; why are you so calm?  
Peaches: Uh, Ma, maybe you should look behind you.  
(Ellie looks to see Dragon's big face looming inches away)  
Peaches: If y'all can stand in the middle of an avalanche and actually stand against its momentum; I'm sure you can be a passenger.  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which the troops gather around the cave entrances leading to the lake; watching as the blazing volcano, a dancing glow against a dark sky, wreaks havoc all around it. 2 second pause before scene fades into next; in which it is just Fiona and Diego watching the volcano; and with the two in the foreground, everyone else is shown in a blurred background, sleeping. 5 second pause, during which Diego tries and fails to catch Fiona's eye. Finally, he just decides to speak...)  
Diego: You're a good parent. I know that. But I think you're making a big mistake by goin' back.  
Fiona: Wh-how did you know?  
Diego (looking over his shoulder, smiling): I'm intuitive. (stands and faces her) Fiona, how many friends do your kids have?  
Fiona: Well...none, really...  
Diego: Exactly. Unless you keep 'em here, that's how it's gonna stay.  
Fiona: I know. And it's wrong. It's unfair. But I've already lost my father. Twice now. Now my friend, and my cousin, and my niece are lost in Far Far Away - in the future - and the stupid thing is, I want to time travel to go get them. I. Want. To time travel. Peaches: If you do that, you're risking everything.  
Fiona: That's why I'm also against it, but I have no choice this time.  
Peaches: No, you don't. But you're wrong about why that is.  
(Fiona and Diego look at her in mild surprise)  
Fiona: Enlighten me.  
Peaches: You're an ogre. You were able to time travel more than once; you were strong enough. If you do it again; you might not have a family when you try to come back. See, for your cousin, your niece...They're just people. If I'm right about this; when they went back to Far Far Away, it was their second time - right?  
(Fiona nods)  
Peaches: If they pass through a dimension too many times; their immune systems get weak. Weaker. Weaker - until they die in the world they last went to. And if that doesn't happen, then their family tree is liable to change in the seconds it takes for their world to shift. It can grow - it can shrink - it can stop existing altogether. Diego: The baby.  
Peaches: Yeah. Her chances are the most slim. Your friend, your cousin, they have better chances. Not by much. If you're gonna go back, even for a few seconds...you're gonna need your husband with you. It'll preserve everything you've got. You must never. Go. Without him. Fiona: Okay. Okay...Okay...  
Peaches: So get on it! Stop wastin' time!  
(Fiona scrambles to her feet and hurries toward Shrek)  
Peaches: You know, Uncle D., if you were as intuitive as you've been leading on; you could've saved us all that time.  
Diego (surprising everyone in the cave by forcing a laugh): Yeah...Go to bed. (As Peaches obeys, Diego turns back to the moonlit view of the lake; his eyes glowing an eerie green. Scene slowly fades into next; in which from within rustling foliage comes the familiar voice of a certain ogre...)  
Shrek: Fiona? Ouch! You make it out okay?  
Fiona: Stop yelling, I'm right beside you.  
Shrek: Ah.  
(They emerge from the bushes; both wearing lapel pin tracking devices)  
Fiona: Oh...crap.  
("Camera" pans across Far Far Away; showing a scene of total destruction. Shrek and Fiona exchange nervous glances)  
Shrek: Well, let's...take it to your place, shall we?  
Fiona: That's my guess. (They run east. Scene fades into next; in which they arrive at the castle to find Queen Lillian, King Harold, Artie, and Snow White mingling outside...)  
Shrek: What is your father doing here?  
Fiona: I don't know. I don't even know if it's a good sign.  
Guard (approaching): Halt! Monsters are forbidden to enter castle grounds!  
Fiona (trying to sound lighthearted): Monsters? (pauses) Maybe there's some mistake; uh...I used to live here. (Shrek, unable to look away from his wife, begins to look bothered)  
Guard: There's no mistake. Why would they want to keep a thing like you?  
Shrek: Hey, you just leave her alone. And get the king and queen over here!  
Guard (not lowering weapon): Hey, man, it's your call. But don't do anything stupid. You're outnumbered.  
(Fiona elbows Shrek; forcing an emotionless smile at the guard. Shrek tries to do the same. Looking creeped out, the guard looks over his shoulder at the king and queen. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which the guard is approaching King Harold and Queen Lillian...)  
Guard: Uh, you have...guests...  
(Artie looks over his shoulder. His eyes go wide and he stands up so quickly that he not only bumps into the table, but knocks over his chair...)  
Artie: Fiona?!  
Shrek: Okay, I don't like this.  
Artie: What...Why are you...like him? (points at Shrek)  
(2 second pause as Shrek stares)  
Fiona: I...married him. You remember my spell...right?  
Artie: Yeah, but...Why? Shrek: Never mind that!  
Fiona: He's right. You need to come with us. You and your wife.  
Artie: Wife! Why would I get married? I'm still technically a minor!  
Snow White: Yeah, no kidding. I don't even like this guy.  
Shrek: Well, regardless. We're wasting time. Look, you live with us way back in time in the Ice Age and you two have a baby; and if you don't come back with us right now you lose everything.  
Artie: I don't think so.  
Snow White: We have everything. I have never been pregnant; and I'd like to keep it that way. Especially if he's the guy you think I wind up with.  
Artie: Gee, thanks.  
Snow White: No problem. Hubby.  
Queen Lillian: Goodness...  
King Harold (standing): Come on, Lillian, let's go and leave this drama to those who belong with it...  
Queen Lillian (flatly): We belong with it.  
King Harold: What?  
Fiona: You know what, Mom...leave him. And stay here if it's what you all want. Suddenly I...I just don't care.  
Shrek: Fiona! Remember what the little mutated elephant said?  
Artie: W-what!  
Fiona (sharply): Nothing, Artie! (turns to Shrek) Yes, I remember. I remember everything. But you know what? We had a good run. I had both parents, a cousin, friends...a niece... Now maybe it's time to just...stop interfering. Yes, it could make us lose everything, even ourselves, but at least it would happen in a way that's...right for us as separate people.  
Shrek: But this could end it for everybody.  
Fiona: I know that.  
Shrek: You, me, your parents...  
Fiona: I know!  
Shrek: The triplets...  
(Fiona hesitates)  
Shrek: Peaches said everything would be fine if we worked as a team. Remember that?  
Fiona: Yes, but without my parents, I have nothing. Don't you get it? Without them, I won't exist. So you go ahead. Go back. I want to preserve this. Because if I go back with you, I'll die. If I stay here, at least I'll still have something. (takes off her lapel pin and puts it on the table)  
Shrek (taking off his lapel pin as well): Well then, what's good for the goose is good for the gander. (places his lapel pin next to Fiona's)  
Fiona: No...No, you can't stay. Those kids need someone.  
Shrek: And they have someone! Manny and Ellie will just adopt them into their herd, like they've done with everyone else. They'll be fine. (crosses arms)  
Fiona: I know what you're doing, Shrek, and it won't work.  
Shrek: What am I doing?  
Fiona: The same thing you're always doing! Running me over with your opinion because you don't like mine.  
Artie (in the background): Ouch!  
Shrek: No, Fiona, I'm preserving everything.  
Fiona: What makes you think you're helping me?  
(In the background, Artie is seen watching the fight in sheer horror)  
Shrek: Gee, I guess because no one's dead yet.  
Fiona: Oh really? Where's Rosie?  
(Shrek pauses and looks again at Snow White. Seconds later, Fiona, Queen Lillian and King Harold are also looking at her...)  
Snow White: Why're you looking at me like that?  
Fiona (turning slowly to Shrek): You can't help me. My mind's made up. Help them.  
Shrek: I figured you'd say something like that. (takes out Felicia's squeaking doll, hands it to Fiona) She wanted you to keep this.  
(Fiona stares at the doll, on the verge of tears)  
Shrek: But you don't need to decide right now. Sleep on it. After all, hasn't time always been a friend?  
(In the background, Artie and Snow White are both seen and heard scoffing in disagreement. They look at each other. Scene fades slowly into next, in which Donkey is pacing back and forth in the cave, making everyone nervous...)  
Puss In Boots (after almost ten seconds): Oh, would you just stand still!  
Donkey: Beat it!  
(Puss In Boots, looking very irritable, starts toward Donkey; but Kitty Softpaws holds him back...)  
Kitty: Leave him alone; he's twice your size.  
Puss In Boots: You underestimate me.  
(2 second pause)  
Kitty: No I don't.  
Cinderella: Ugh, the suspense is killing me!  
Sleeping Beauty (finishing a yawn): Someone tell a story.  
Manny: What?  
Ellie: No, that's a good idea.  
Nigel (just a voice coming from the nest): I have one. True.  
Donkey: Man, I do not care about that right now; I just want everyone back here where they belong.  
Nigel: Funny, that's kinda what the story's about. Except it's spooky.  
Manny: Oh, good, a spooky story for someone already nervous. That'll work.  
Ellie: It could be funny...  
Cinderella: Give it a shot already.  
Puss In Boots: Yeah, tranquilizer...  
(Diego smiles)  
Nigel: It revolves around this guy I know, and the love of his life was killed by a shark. Only one of his kids is still alive today, and he was always bein' supervised. Well one day he'd had just about enough, and he did somethin' forbidden to prove he could handle a day alone. But it backfired, and he wound up gettin' kidnapped.  
Ellie: Jeez!  
Nigel: By now I should clue you in that this all takes place underwater. A family of fish, really, and the kid was taken to the office of a dentist who'd been scuba-divin'. He met weird fish, scary fish - I suppose in lots'a ways, they can relate to all'a you. But, see, the little fish was in trouble! The dentist's niece, a real fish-killer, was gonna receive him as a gift. So as his new friends are doin' everything in their power to return him to the ocean; his dad's tryin'a find this place. And oddly enough, it takes a fish with memory loss to get him there!  
Diego: You're kidding.  
Nigel: Not at all. Hence 'true' story, mate.  
(Peaches giggles)  
Nigel: Well, on their way, they meet a whole group'a sharks, one of which wants to eat 'em. Then they get attacked by a whole mess'a jellyfish; and when they come to, they're ridin' with turtles!  
Manny: Get out.  
Nigel: I swear by it, I was told everythin'. So then they're swallowed up by this whale, and at this point the father's 'bout ready to give up. I mean, either Lady Luck has a hex on him or it's just a bad day.  
Peaches: Sounds like a mix.  
Nigel: Yep. But then they're released from the whale, and the destination's right there in front of 'em. But of course, then they're swallowed up for breakfast, and I swoop in and save 'em from that...and then we get to the office and wouldn't you know it, the kid's belly-up in a plastic bag and the fish-killer's screamin' her head off.  
Peaches: Sure wonder which college she'll go to...  
Ellie: Shh!  
Nigel: So I dump 'em back into the ocean, and the pair split up. However, the kid was only pretendin' to be dead, and he gets back into the ocean...and the fish with memory loss is able to reunite 'im with his father!  
Ellie: No, you serious?  
Nigel: Sure am! But now there's a little bit of trouble.  
Diego (flatly): When will it end...  
Nigel: I know! I know, tell me about it. (hops up over the nest, finally visible) See, when the troublemaker met the kid's father, they got into a huge fight. Marlin, the kid's dad, doesn't want Nemo to see his friends anymore, and so he tries draggin' the kid away by his fin! Well, Nemo breaks away and swims back to his friends; and they take him with 'em. Now they're out there hidin' somewhere; and Marlin's out lookin' for 'em.  
Manny: That's ridiculous. A parent has the right to have a choice in who the kids' friends are.  
Nigel: Yes, but he's not a kid anymore. And even if he were, so what? Those fish are decent. They've finished school, so there isn't a class for them to cut; plus they've been through more than Marlin has, so they can teach Nemo more even if he does miss school; and there are more of them, which means more protection. Far as I can tell, he's better off with these guys. His father seems...  
(3 second pause)  
Ellie: Don't you think maybe he's just being careful because of what happened with his other children?  
(No one can answer, because the moment is interrupted when Dragon ushers the six dronkeys inside. The commotion wakes up Tyroko and the three triplets, who start crying simultaneously)  
Diego: See, Manny, this is why I don't have kids.  
Manny: Hey, you watch it.  
Lenny (from the cave entrance): Hey. Diego.  
(Diego blankly looks over at Lenny)  
Lenny: Step outside for a minute.  
Diego: What do you want?  
Lenny: I guess you'll find out. (abandons cave entrance)  
Diego: I'll be back, guys. (leaves cave)  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Diego leaves the cave; looking over his shoulder as Lillian pulls the curtain shut to ensure their privacy. Diego continues to follow Lenny; who leads him just out of earshot of the cave)  
Lenny: You're ruining everything.  
Diego: What's there to ruin?  
Lenny: As I said, everything. You are supposed to be dead.  
Diego: Why does everyone keep insisting that? (3 second pause as Diego silently begins to understand)  
Diego: Wait a minute. (catches on as Lenny looks away) It was you! You caused the avalanche. You wanted Zeke and Oscar dead!  
Lenny: Yes. But Zeke ain't dead yet. So don't get in my way.  
Diego: He's all yours. But there is one flaw in your plan.  
Lenny: And what's that?  
Diego: Not all jellyfish are without spines.  
(4 second pause, during which Oscar comes up from behind Diego. Lenny stares; and Diego just smiles)  
Diego: But have you ever seen a strong bubble?  
Lenny: This ain't over. (leaves)  
Oscar: I held up my end of the bargain, Diego.  
Diego: Yep. Follow me. (leads Oscar toward cave. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Oscar and Diego duck under the curtain just in time to see everyone, frozen in shock, as a glowing purple glow lights up the cave. When the glow fades, everyone is happy to see Shrek, Fiona, Harold, Artie, Snow White, and Rosie. However, they are shocked when they see Lillian standing head to head with...herself. Scene freezes)  
* * *


	4. Chapter 4

**PART 4 08.18.12 - 10.20.12 **  
*** * ***

Sid (as in the background, Artie and Snow White are happily reunited with Rosie): Okay, something's wrong.  
Lillian Replica: Harold? Um - who are all these people - and why am I over there?  
Donkey: You're not over there. You're over there.  
Lillian: Somebody explain this!  
Lillian Replica: Goodness, I'm a snob...  
Peaches: Be quiet, the both of you.  
Harold (coming to stand between the two Lillians): Hey!  
(Everyone looks at him)  
King Harold: I'm the king of queens!  
Shrek (as Fiona laughs): Good one.  
Lillian: Peaches - your input?  
Peaches: I, uh, I don't have one.  
(Everyone gasps)  
Donkey: What?!  
Puss In Boots: This is terrible!  
Peaches: Sorry.  
Tyroko: Sorry.  
(Everyone looks at her; but has little time to rejoice when Nigel flies into the cave and lands, distressed, on Ellie's right tusk)  
Nigel: It's time! Zeke (voice from downstairs): What for?  
Nigel: Why, to relocate, of course!  
Harold: So soon?  
Snow White (holding Rosie): You know, as weird as this might sound; I'm actually going to miss this place.  
Fiona: That's an easy fix.  
Snow White: What?  
Fiona (walking to the wall and extracting a gemstone from it): We'll take it with us.  
(2 second pause before with no transition, scene becomes next; in which Shrek, Fiona, Artie, King Harold, the two Lillians, Sid, and Diego work together to dig the gems out of the wall; using their nails - or claws. An annoyed-looking Aia walks along the wall, breaking a whole bunch of gems free using her tusk as she follows the wall. Diego looks over his shoulder, which catches the attention of everyone else, as they hear a loud clatter. They turn to see a bunch of gems bouncing across the cave floor...)  
Aia: What? (Manny looks blatantly disturbed) Aia: Look, y'all heard the guy, the time to go is now. You were takin' too long!  
(Sid approaches the colorful mess on the floor and throws down one more gem. Diego rolls his eyes)  
Sid: Now there's enough for each of us.  
Lillian Replica: And leave it to a guy to notice that.  
Ellie (to Harold): Okay, no offense, but don't you find it weird to have two wives?  
Harold: A little. But it's not like they're different people!  
Lillian Replica (putting the gems into her duffel bag): Well, I suppose we could make it work.  
(Shrek looks over at Fiona in time to see her put one hand to her forehead and turn away)  
Lillian (quietly, to Snow White): I can't be jealous of myself, can I?  
Snow White (optimistically): Nope. I mean, come on; if I had two Arties - Artie: Whoa, okay, let's just go!  
(Ellie and Aia help Zeke out of the cave as everyone else leads them out, and briefly alone, Artie slyly anticipates the thought of having two Snow Whites before following them. 3 second pause before Fiona runs back into the cave and begins kicking and punching the time machine. After a few seconds of fighting it; she's zapped. She pauses and looks at her finger; and then Shrek comes in, sees the busted machine, and guides her out of the cave to the others. Scene fades into next; in which Dragon is flying the group over a flooding land. "Camera" pans ahead and down, zooming in on Rapunzel; who is sitting on a floating log. She hears Dragon's roar and looks up in time to see her stop flying; instead hovering directly above her)  
Shrek (to Fiona): Your call.  
Fiona: Do it.  
Shrek (leaning over and calling to Rapunzel): Welcome aboard!  
(Looking relieved; Rapunzel stands, takes off her wig and throws one end to Shrek. Seeing Rapunzel is still holding on to one end; Dragon keeps flying; and Rapunzel jumps off the log and allows herself to be carried over the floodwater; skimming it with only half an inch between her and the water's surface)  
Rapunzel (calling up): You have not lived until you've done this!  
(Meanwhile, on Dragon's back...)  
Sid: I didn't know she was bald!  
(Dragon slows down to a hover at that moment. Diego looks over his shoulder to see Oscar and Lenny climbing up Dragon's tail)  
Diego: Always a price.  
Manny: Well, technically this one's a freebie.  
(Diego peers down at Rapunzel, who's still having a blast swinging around on her wig lasso. Diego slowly sits up and looks back at Manny)  
Diego: Good point.  
(With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Dragon lands on a cliff overlooking the flood at a higher level than the cave)  
Donkey (as everyone gets off): Land ho. Again. Y'know, we ought to be hopin' the flood's not gonna affect us way up here.  
Shrek: It won't.  
Donkey: You can't know that. Man, if there was ever a way to know everything, we'd first have to be smart enough to find that way.  
Shrek: Gee, thanks.  
Donkey: Alright, don't get all psychotic on me.  
(3 second pause)  
Fiona: Where are we?  
Ellie (expectantly): Peaches?  
Peaches: Does it matter?  
Ellie: Yes.  
Peaches: Well...whatever, don't ask me. I'm tired of being 'the smart one'. I'm just a kid.  
Donkey: Which means you'll make a kickass full-grown...whatever-you-are.  
Manny: She's a mammoth. Just like her parents.  
Donkey: Hey, man, I understand the whole breeding concept. Just I ain't never seen one before.  
Shrek: True enough.  
Diego: Anyway... (gets all attention) ...To answer your question, we're located southeast.  
Crash: What makes you so sure?  
(Diego silently looks vaguely to his right at the volcano; still erupting. Everyone else looks. Diego bristles as Lenny, unnoticed, walks to Diego's left side and pauses)  
Lenny (quietly, for Diego alone to hear): I'm not done with you yet. (continues)  
Fiona (approaching Diego): Hey. (continues only when Diego looks at her) Your place here is clear to you, right?  
Diego: Yeah.  
Fiona: You're aware you're okay by me?  
Diego: Yeah.  
Fiona: Good, good, I'm glad. And with that covered...Are you insane?  
Diego: Well, I tolerate Sid, so yes, I am.  
Sid (passing by): I resent that.  
Diego (unemotionally): I resent you. (looks back at Fiona as she replies)  
Fiona: First you don't warn us about Rapunzel time-traveling here; then when you do mention her, she's at our cave with some dinosaur - Diego: Well, see - Fiona: And then just like that, you're all buddy-buddy again with Oscar.  
Diego: You should talk.  
Fiona: Excuse me?  
Diego: You heard me.  
Fiona: Yes, but I want to know if I heard you correctly. I mean, what you did...  
Diego: What I did was by accident. I'm not psychic - I didn't know Rapunzel was an opposition. Fiona: That's one down, continue.  
Diego: Oscar and I had a deal. He got rid of Lenny, so he camps with us. Manny: You struck a deal with him?  
Diego: Hey, we're safer.  
Manny: From Lenny! Now we have Oscar and Zeke and...Dope on a Rope to worry about.  
Fiona: Yeah...Have fun with that.  
Manny/Diego: What?  
Fiona: I'm done.  
Ellie: What's that supposed to mean?  
Fiona: I can't do this anymore. Dinosaurs, sabers, floods, avalanches, mammoths. It's too much!  
Shrek: We're leaving?  
Donkey: Again?  
Fiona: You can both do whatever you want. I'm not stopping you from staying here, if that's where you want to be...but I'm going home.  
Shrek: This is home! Far Far Away is a nightmare!  
Fiona: At least it isn't going to be underwater. And may I remind you of the swamp. (pauses, gets no response) Fine. Take care of yourself. (places the triplets into their wheeled cage and begins pushing it away with her as she walks)  
Rapunzel: I won't let you go back to that cave and risk four lives, Fiona. No way. Can't.  
Fiona: Sure you can, back off.  
Rapunzel: Let me finish! (silence) I have a time machine right here, around my neck. (fingers necklace)  
Fiona: No way!  
Rapunzel: Yes. (pushes button; a time portal appears) Question is - do you need it?  
Shrek: Ah, crap, we're comin' too, hang on.  
Fiona: Don't let my decision make yours, Shrek.  
Shrek: That's just great, Princess! Push me away!  
Fiona: As I recall, you're quite good at that.  
Shrek: Fine! Leave!  
Fiona: I am! Just...quit delaying me!  
Snow White: (furious): SHUT UP!  
(3 second silence)  
Snow White: God, Fiona, practice what you preach! Make it work! No one's going anywhere. (rips necklace off Rapunzel's neck) Except for you. (pushes Rapunzel into the time portal; and then promptly pushes Lillian Replica into the time portal after her. As everyone stares in horror, Snow White pushes the Off button on the deceptive necklace; making the time portal disappear into thin air. Snow White then throws the necklace off the cliff)  
Ellie: You go, Snow!  
Snow White (approaching Oscar and Zeke): Now both of you count your blessings I didn't shove your sorry hides into that thing too. You owe me big, and I want you to turn around, intrude into someone else's life, and leave me and my gang alone; you got it?  
(Zeke and Oscar meekly turn around and leave; getting lost within the astonished audience)  
Diego: Wow.  
Snow White: Don't get any ideas; I don't promote bestiality.  
(Diego looks confused)  
Sid (occupied, drawing in the dirt): Aw, that's too bad. You'd go well together.  
Manny: Sid?  
Sid (looking up): Oh, I mean, um...Go, Snow?  
Snow White: Thanks, I think. (approaches Shrek and Fiona) Take five lousy minutes to fix things. The disaster will still be here when you get back; now vamoose.  
Shrek: Thank you. (walks away with Fiona)  
Manny: You handled that pretty nicely.  
Snow White: I suppose living with seven womanizing men has prepared me for problematic couples.  
Peaches: Possible factor.  
Snow White: In any case...(turns to Manny and Diego)...Now that your fight has no foundation, do you think you can move on?  
Manny: Don't make me step on you.  
Peaches: Dad?  
Manny (looking over at her): Oh - sweetie, I wouldn't.  
Snow White (making Ellie smile): And I was frantic all this time. Artie (silencing all): Look!  
(Everyone looks to see the world below going underwater)  
Sid/Crash (in eery singsong): It's here...(they look at each other after realizing their voices have overlapped)  
Diego (passing Oscar and Zeke): Come on, freaks; you've just been recruited. Zeke: Why should we go anywhere with you?  
Diego (turning back): In case you haven't noticed, Dragon's tail takes up half the island. You don't got much choice. Besides, we're splittin' up to make it go faster.  
Zeke: Fine. But what're we doin'?  
Diego: Lookin' for food. Be useful for once. A lot's at stake here.  
Zeke (as he and Oscar follow): Umm, you do realize there are over thirty animals on this island - y'know, plus your cockamamie crew?  
Diego: I'm not even going to argue with that one. (Scene fades into next; in which Shrek and Fiona are sitting on the sand, leaning against a tree; watching the flooded world below)  
Fiona: I'm really glad we worked things out.  
Shrek: Me too.  
Fiona: Such a shame, though, to not go back. I'm going to miss home. And, you know, the castle. (they smile)  
Shrek: Yeah...  
(2 second pause)  
Shrek: You ever wonder why Cinderella would visit you?  
Fiona: I was under the impression our friendship was the reason.  
Shrek: I don't mean it like that! But why did she not insist on us visiting her? Kind of a shock.  
(The crunch of a twig and dead leaves silence them. The sound continues...)  
Fiona (tentatively): Hello?  
(3 second pause before Oscar and Zeke come out from the foliage; one on either side of Shrek and Fiona, who get up simultaneously)  
Oscar: Zeke. Looks like we found ours.  
Shrek: What?  
Fiona: Never mind them, just walk with me. (grabs Shrek's hand and walks toward the others; but they take only two steps when they see Diego blocking their path. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Queen Lillian excuses herself from the group and walks toward the right of the "camera"; which next zooms into the remaining group. Artie and Snow White are roasting marshmallows; all the dronkeys and Peaches are playing with Rosie and Tyroko, supervised by Dragon; and Cinderella is seen in the background, quietly talking with King Harold, Manny, and Ellie)  
Artie: Y'know...I'm really glad you got rid of Rapunzel. Strange as it may sound, I prefer it over here.  
Snow White: That doesn't sound strange; I'm right there with you. I'm just glad we got Rosie back.  
Artie: Yeah. I don't care what opportunity I get next - no more time travel.  
Snow White: Agreed.  
Artie: It's just too risky! Besides, if in some alternate universe, Rapunzel is alive; then there's a slim chance she was reunited with Charming again. You never know. And - more power to them. Snow White: Ah, crap.  
Artie: What?  
Snow White: "More power to 'em". Famous last words!  
Artie: You believe in black magic?  
Snow White: Black magic, voodoo, karma, superstitions...  
Artie: Really!  
Snow White: You don't? Even after everything? (pause) We went through time.  
Artie: I'm not arguing the facts! But there are no facts to magic.  
Snow White: I never mentioned the facts!  
Artie: There's nothing magical about "famous last words".  
Snow White: One word for ya - superstition.  
(Artie pauses and nods his agreement)  
Snow White: Besides, how is a time portal any different to black magic? They are only as similar as their unjustified existences. They shouldn't exist but they do! It's voodoo! Now how can you not believe?  
Artie: Huh.  
(Snow White gives Artie a "told-ya-so" look and plucks a marshmallow off the twig. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Queen Lillian is looking for a suitable bush. She then spots the three sabers surrounding her daughter and son-in-law...)  
Queen Lillian (approaching): What's going on here?  
(Diego, Zeke and Oscar look at her simultaneously; Shrek and Fiona never take their eyes off the sabers)  
Zeke: Diego here told us to find rations. So we did! He led us right to 'em! (Oscar bonks him on the head, silencing him)  
Lillian (to Diego): I knew it. I knew you couldn't be trusted.  
Diego: Takes a bad goose to know a bad egg.  
Fiona: That's my mother you're talking to!  
Zeke: Just talking. We ain't doin' nothin' yet.  
Fiona: If you're going to kill us; at least let our last few moments be in the presence of those who will speak properly.  
Shrek: Oh, aye!  
Oscar: Why don't you scat, Lily.  
(Lillian glares; then turns and walks huffily away toward camp)  
Zeke: That's better.  
Oscar: Agreed. Now maybe we can get something accomplished.  
Diego: Don't you ladies ever stop talking? (pushes roughly in between Zeke and Oscar, approaches Fiona) RUN!  
(Shrek and Fiona bolt to the foliage to their right. As Zeke and Oscar start after them; Diego jumps Oscar and sinks his teeth into his neck. As Oscar emits a weak, pitiful scream; Zeke halts, turns and stares. In total fear he begins backing up. Diego releases Oscar, who falls limply to the ground. Blood drips off Diego's fangs. 4 second silence. Diego starts toward Zeke)  
Zeke: No...Wait, no, please! I...I...No...  
Diego: No?  
Zeke: No!  
Diego: Then get lost.  
Zeke: And go where?  
(Diego takes a few more steps toward Zeke)  
Zeke: Alright, I'm leaving!  
Diego: And don't come back.  
(Zeke turns and trots away. Diego watches his retreating figure for 2 seconds before looking behind him at Oscar's body. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Diego is burying Oscar in the sand. Finished, he trots over to where sand meets water; and steps in. He wades in knee-deep and then faces the shore; laying down in the water, allowing only his nose and eyes to peek out. 3 second pause as Diego's eyes nervously scan the surrounding foliage before he submerges his head into the water. With no transition, scene becomes next; in which Fiona is watching Diego as he splashes, almost playfully, in the water. Shaking her head, Fiona disappears behind a treeline. Scene fades into next; in which Fiona is sitting on the sleeping bag, in which Shrek is sleeping peacefully to her right. Fiona looks over her shoulder at him, gives a small, sad smile; and then looks ahead to the fire. Then she bows her head, covers both eyes with her hands, and cries)

THE END


End file.
